‘What about my own infatuation for her?’ he questioned himself at length. ‘No doubt, it’s physical to the bones. Am I not dying to possess her? But then, my all-consuming passion stems from a deep-rooted affection for her. Can’t I perceive the purity of my love for her in the depths of my heart? After all, my craving is not all about possessing her, fabulous though she is. Why, am I not dying to bring about the fusion of our souls through our emotional togetherness? How fulfilled would I be, if only I could fill the void in her life, once and for all. Maybe, her feelings for me are no different. Haven’t I seen the longing of her soul in her gaze as I felt the craving of her love in her touch? What else I can do than pray that she has the patience to wait for the fruition of our love in a momentous union. That is, without she falling by the wayside as a victim of seduction in the meantime.’
‘Why did I fail to declare my love to her?’ he thought as he went on recalling their romance. ‘But then, didn’t my eyes speak enough about my infatuation for her. Couldn’t she have grasped my intent from all those innuendoes? True, she can’t be expected to take all that as the testimony of my devotion to her. Had I let her known that I loved her, it would perhaps have helped her persevere with her own love for me. But then, that way I should’ve offended her sensitivity in the formative period of her affection for me.’
‘What if I write to her now,’ he thought, as a way out of the predicament. ‘Won’t it give rise to misgivings in her mind, besides compromising my position? And then, why can’t all this be a mere flight of my own imagination? Being over strung myself, am I not going crazy in my head? Maybe, for her, it could be no more than a mere crush on me, and having seen our backs, she would have got back into her routine by now, wouldn’t she have?’
The feeling that Roopa may not be in danger as feared, eased his conscience in spite of his surmised indifference of her towards him.
‘Whatever it may be,’ he seemed to have decided, ‘better we move early and hope for the best in the meantime. I’ll have to make her mine if I were to be truly happy. What a treasure she’s to possess. What a remarkable woman she is indeed.’