Never did a pair of top boots, big or little, shine with a lustre
more resplendent; never was postilion's jacket more excellent of fit,
nattier, or more carefully brushed; and nowhere could there be found
two rows of crested silver buttons with such an air of waggish
roguery, so sly, so knowing, and so pertinaciously on the everlasting
wink, as these same eight buttons that adorned the very small person
of his groomship, Milo of Crotona. He had slipped out suddenly from
the hedge, and now stood cap in hand, staring from the Viscount to
Barnabas, and back again, with his innocent blue eyes, and with every
blinking, twinkling button on his jacket. And his eyes were wide and
guileless--the eyes of a cherub; but his buttons!
Yea, forsooth, it was all in his buttons as they winked slyly one to
another as much as to say: "Aha! we don't know why his Lordship's nankeens are greened at the
knees, not we! nor why the gent's lower lip is unduly swelled. Lord
love your eyes and limbs, oh no!"
"What, my imp of innocence!" exclaimed the Viscount. "Where have you
sprung from?"
"'Edge, m'lud."
"Ah! and what might you have been doing in the hedge now?"
"Think'n', m'lud."
"And what were you thinking?"
"I were think'n', m'lud, as the tall genelman here is a top-sawyer
wi' 'is daddies, m'lud. I was."
"Aha! so you've been watching, eh?"
"Not watchin'--oh no, m'lud; I just 'appened ter notice--that's all,
m'lud."
"Ha!" exclaimed the Viscount; "then I suppose you happened to notice
me being--knocked down?"
"No, m'lud; ye see, I shut my eyes--every time."
"Every time, eh!" said his Lordship, with his whimsical smile.
"Oh Loyalty, thy name is Milo! But hallo!" he broke off, "I believe
you've been fighting again--come here!"
"Fightin', m'lud! What, me?"
"What's the matter with your face--it's all swollen; there, your
cheek?"
"Swellin', m'lud; I don't feel no swellin'."
"No, no; the other cheek."
"Oh, this, m'lud. Oh, 'e done it, 'e did; but I weren't fightin'."
"Who did it?"
"S' Mortimer's friend, 'e done it, 'e did."
"Sir Mortimer's friend?"
"Ah, 'im, m'lud."
"But, how in the world--"
"Wi' his fist, m'lud."
"What for?"
"'Cos I kicked 'im, I did."
"You--kicked Sir Mortimer Carnaby's friend!" exclaimed the Viscount.
"What in heaven's name did you do that for?"
"'Cos you told me to, m'lud, you did."
"I told you to kick--"
"Yes, m'lud, you did. You sez to me, last week--arter I done up that
butcher's boy--you sez to me, 'don't fight 'cept you can't 'elp it,'
you sez; 'but allus pertect the ladies,' you sez, 'an if so be as
'e's too big to reach wi' your fists--why, use your boots,' you sez,
an' so I did, m'lud."