"You know what the next event was; you know how I entered this house.
"I have not tried to make the worst of my trials and troubles in telling
you what my life has been. I have honestly described it for what it was
when I met with Miss Roseberry--a life without hope. May you never know
the temptation that tried me when the shell struck its victim in the
French cottage! There she lay--dead! _Her_ name was untainted. _Her_
future promised me the reward which had been denied to the honest
efforts of a penitent woman. My lost place in the world was offered back
to me on the one condition that I stooped to win it by a fraud. I had
no prospect to look forward to; I had no friend near to advise me and to
save me; the fairest years of my womanhood had been wasted in the
vain struggle to recover my good name. Such was my position when the
possibility of personating Miss Roseberry first forced itself on my
mind. Impulsively, recklessly--wickedly, if you like--I seized the
opportunity, and let you pass me through the German lines under Miss
Roseberry's name. Arrived in England, having had time to reflect, I made
my first and last effort to draw back before it was too late. I went to
the Refuge, and stopped on the opposite side of the street, looking at
it. The old hopeless life of irretrievable disgrace confronted me as I
fixed my eyes on the familiar door; the horror of returning to that life
was more than I could force myself to endure. An empty cab passed me at
the moment. The driver held up his hand. In sheer despair I stopped
him, and when he said 'Where to?' in sheer despair again I answered,
'Mablethorpe House.' "Of what I have suffered in secret since my own successful deception
established me under Lady Janet's care I shall say nothing. Many things
which must have surprised you in my conduct are made plain to you by
this time. You must have noticed long since that I was not a happy
woman. Now you know why.
"My confession is made; my conscience has spoken at last. You are
released from your promise to me--you are free. Thank Mr. Julian Gray if
I stand here self-accused of the offense, that I have committed, before
the man whom I have wronged."