On I went, chin on breast, heedless of all direction--now beneath
the shade of trees, now crossing grassy glades or rolling meadow,
or threading my way through long alleys of hop-vines; on and on,
skirting hedges, by haycocks looming ghostly in the dark, by
rustling cornfields, through wood and coppice, where branches
touched me, as I passed, like ghostly fingers in the dark; on I
went, lost to all things but my own thoughts. And my thoughts
were not of Life nor Death nor the world nor the spaces beyond
the world--but of my Virgil book with the broken cover, and of
him who had looked at it--over her shoulder. And, raising my
hands, I clasped them about my temples, and, leaning against a
tree, stood there a great while. Yet, when the trembling fit had
left me, I went on again, and with every footstep there rose a
voice within me, crying: "Why? Why? Why?"
Why should I, Peter Vibart, hale and well in body, healthy in
mind--why should I fall thus into ague-spasms because of a woman
--of whom I knew nothing, who had come I knew not whence,
accompanied by one whose presence, under such conditions, meant
infamy to any woman; why should I burn thus in a fever if she
chose to meet another while I was abroad? Was she not free to
follow her own devices; had I any claim upon her; by what right
did I seek to compass her goings and comings, or interest myself
in her doings? Why? Why? Why?
As I went, the woods gradually fell away, and I came out upon an
open place. The ground rose sharply before me, but I climbed on
and up and so, in time, stood upon a hill.
Now, standing upon this elevation, with the woods looming dimly
below me, as if they were a dark tide hemming me in on all sides,
I became conscious of a sudden great quietude in the air--a
stillness that was like the hush of expectancy; not a sound came
to me, not a whisper from the myriad leaves below.
But, as I stood there listening, very faint and far away, I heard
a murmur that rose and died and rose again, that swelled and
swelled into the roll of distant thunder. Down in the woods was
a faint rustling, as if some giant were stirring among the
leaves, and out of their depths breathed a puff of wind that
fanned my cheek, and so was gone. But, in a while, it was back
again, stronger, more insistent than before, till, sudden as it
came, it died away again, and all was hushed and still, save only
for the tremor down there among the leaves; but lightning
flickered upon the horizon, the thunder rolled nearer and nearer,
and the giant grew ever more restless.