She replied that she would bring in an account of the expenses of it in
two or three shapes, and like a bill of fare, I should choose as I
pleased; and I desired her to do so.
The next day she brought it, and the copy of her three bills was a
follows:-1. For three months' lodging in her house, including
my diet, at 10s. a week . . . . . . . . . . . 6#, 0s., 0d.
2. For a nurse for the month, and use of childbed
linen . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1#, 10s., 0d.
3. For a minister to christen the child, and to the
godfathers and clerk . . . . . . . . . . . . 1#, 10s., 0d.
4. For a supper at the christening if I had five friends
at it . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1#, 0s., 0d.
For her fees as a midwife, and the taking off the
trouble of the parish . . . . . . . . . . . . 3#, 3s., 0d.
To her maid servant attending . . . . . . . . 0#, 10s., 0d.
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13#, 13s., 0d.
This was the first bill; the second was the same terms:-1. For three months' lodging and diet, etc., at 20s.
per week . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13#, 0s., 0d.
2. For a nurse for the month, and the use of linen
and lace . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2#, 10s., 0d.
3. For the minister to christen the child, etc., as
above . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2#, 0s., 0d.
4. For supper and for sweetmeats
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3#, 3s., 0d.
For her fees as above . . . . . . . . . . . . 5#, 5s., 0d.
For a servant-maid . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1#, 0s., 0d.
--------------
26#, 18s., 0d.
This was the second-rate bill; the third, she said, was for a degree
higher, and when the father or friends appeared:-1. For three months' lodging and diet, having two
rooms and a garret for a servant . . . . . . 30#, 0s., 0d., 2. For a nurse for the month, and the finest suit
of childbed linen . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4#, 4s., 0d.
3. For the minister to christen the child, etc. 2#, 10s., 0d.
4. For a supper, the gentlemen to send in the
wine . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6#, 0s., 0d.
For my fees, etc. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10#, 10s., 0d.
The maid, besides their own maid, only
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 0#, 10s., 0d.
--------------
53#, 14s., 0d.
I looked upon all three bills, and smiled, and told her I did not see
but that she was very reasonable in her demands, all things considered,
and for that I did not doubt but her accommodations were good.
She told me I should be judge of that when I saw them. I told her I
was sorry to tell her that I feared I must be her lowest-rated
customer. 'And perhaps, madam,' said I, 'you will make me the less
welcome upon that account.' 'No, not at all,' said she; 'for where I
have one of the third sort I have two of the second, and four to one of
the first, and I get as much by them in proportion as by any; but if
you doubt my care of you, I will allow any friend you have to overlook
and see if you are well waited on or no.' Then she explained the particulars of her bill. 'In the first place,
madam,' said she, 'I would have you observe that here is three months'
keeping; you are but ten shillings a week; I undertake to say you will
not complain of my table. I suppose,' says she, 'you do not live
cheaper where you are now?' 'No, indeed,' said I, 'not so cheap, for I
give six shillings per week for my chamber, and find my own diet as
well as I can, which costs me a great deal more.' 'Then, madam,' says she, 'if the child should not live, or should be
dead-born, as you know sometimes happens, then there is the minister's
article saved; and if you have no friends to come to you, you may save
the expense of a supper; so that take those articles out, madam,' says
she, 'your lying in will not cost you above #5, 3s. in all more than
your ordinary charge of living.' This was the most reasonable thing that I ever heard of; so I smiled,
and told her I would come and be her customer; but I told her also,
that as I had two months and more to do, I might perhaps be obliged to
stay longer with her than three months, and desired to know if she
would not be obliged to remove me before it was proper. No, she said;
her house was large, and besides, she never put anybody to remove, that
had lain in, till they were willing to go; and if she had more ladies
offered, she was not so ill-beloved among her neighbours but she could
provide accommodations for twenty, if there was occasion.