"And yet, dear Martin, you lived with her on--on our island?"
"Aye, I did--to my torment, and prayed God I might not slay her." And here in breathless fashion I told my lady of Joanna's coming and of the ills that followed; but seeing the growing trouble in her look, my arms fell from her and great bitterness filled me. "Ah, God in heaven, Damaris!" I cried, "never say you doubt my word--"
"Martin!"
I rose to my feet to behold Joanna within a yard of us. For a long and breathless moment she looked from me to other of us and then, shuddering, hid her face in her two hands.
"Dear my lady," said she at last, "if by reason of his wound my loved Martin hath grown strange to me and all his love for me forgot--if indeed you do love him--to you that have been more than sister and gentle friend to miserable Joanna, to you I do yield my love henceforth, nor will I repine, since my love for thee shall teach me how to bear my shame, yes--"
"Ha, damned liar!" I cried, and turned on Joanna with clenched fists; and then my lady's restraining arms were about me and I sank half-swooning against the ship's side.
"Dear Martin," said she, viewing me tearful-eyed, "you are not yourself--"
"No!" cried I, burying my throbbing head betwixt my arms. "I am Fortune's Fool--the world is upside down--God help me, I shall run mad in very truth. Oh, damned Fortune--curst Fate!" and I brake out into futile raving awhile. When at last I raised my head it was to behold my lady clasping this vile creature in her arms and cherishing her with tender words and caresses, the which sight wrought me to a very frenzy of cold and bitter rage. Said I: "My Lady Brandon, God knoweth I have greatly loved you, wherein I have wasted myself on a vain thing as is to me right manifest. So now, since you have buried your love, mine do I tear from me and cast utterly away; henceforth I am no more than an instrument of vengeance--"
"Martin!" cried she. "Oh, dear Martin, for the love of God--"
But (Oh, vain folly! Oh, detestable pride!) I heeded not this merciful appeal nor the crying of my own heart, but turning my back upon my noble lady, stumbled away and with never another word or look. And thus I (that was born to be my own undoer) once more barred myself out from all that life offered me of happiness, since pride is ever purblind.
Presently, espying Godby where divers of his fellows rove new tackle to a gun, I enquired for Adam.