Tears pricked my eyes and I looked away.
The bed shifted, and I felt the heat of him at my back. I shivered at the feel of his breath on my neck as he brushed my hair out of the way with one hand and wrapped his other arm around my waist, bringing me back against his chest. “I don’t want to fight this anymore. I’m so fucking tired of fighting.” He pressed a kiss to my neck, and I squeezed my eyes shut. He might have been tired of fighting, but I wasn’t.
He’d hurt me so badly.
Just like my family.
Until now I didn’t even realize how bloody angry I was with him.
“I’ll talk to Maia,” he said softly in my ear. “I can make this work and still focus on her.”
“Maia wants us to be together,” I told him flatly. “She’s been trying to push us together from the start.”
Logan tensed. “You’re joking?”
“Nope. I guessed as much after the night we dragged her home from the club. She’s admitted it to me.”
He pressed his forehead against my shoulder. “Are you telling me all the huffy shit she pulled wasn’t about other women – it was about the fact that the other women weren’t you?” I could hear the rumble of amusement in his voice, and I willed my body to stop reacting to it.
“Yes.”
He chuckled and pulled me against him, his fingers slipping under the hem of my T-shirt. “My girl has got good taste.”
I jerked out of his arms, pushing myself off the bed. I turned to stare down at him incredulously. “Do you think that’s it? All you have to do is say you want me and I’ll come running?”
Logan frowned. “That’s not… I’m just trying to be honest.”
“You rejected me, Logan,” I whispered, feeling the pain of it all over again. “When I was at my most vulnerable. I know right now you’re feeling a shitload of guilt over things that you couldn’t control, and I’m sorry for that because I don’t believe that you deserve to feel guilt over that. But this” – I gestured between us – “it’s not happening. You humiliated me.”
He pushed the duvet away to get out of the bed, and I backed up as he came toward me. I slammed up against the wall as he pressed his hands to either side of my head, caging me in. His chest moved up and down with his rapid breaths. “I never meant to hurt you, babe,” he promised, his voice deep with sincerity. “I thought I was protecting you.”
“From what?”
“From ending up with someone like me.”
I shook my head, looking away so I didn’t have to see all the self-recrimination and pain in his eyes. It always called to me. It always begged me to soothe him, and I wasn’t sure I could fight the need to do it.
“Do you know how fucking beautiful you are?” he whispered, pressing his cheek against mine, his stubble prickling my skin in a way that sent delicious shivers rippling through me. “And I don’t just mean this.” He slid a hand up my waist, his thumb brushing the underside of my breast. My nipples tightened, my body betraying me. He pulled back and tipped my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze. I sucked in my breath at the need in his eyes. “You are the kindest, funniest, most compassionate woman I have ever known. The fact that you’re gorgeous and the classiest fucking woman I’ve ever met just makes it harder not to want you. And I want you, Grace. Never doubt that I have wanted you since the moment you snapped at me about that thong.” He came closer, his lips almost touching mine. “And I’ve needed you since the moment you took my hand at Maryanne’s.”
“Logan…” I shook my head. “I can’t. I can’t… I… I don’t trust you anymore. Not with me.”
He squeezed his eyes closed, pain tightening his face. “Don’t say that.”
I almost whimpered at the hurt plea. “I can’t help it.”
When he opened his eyes, I saw the panic in his eyes melt suddenly, only to have determination take its place. “I’m going to make this right.”
“Logan, please… Let’s just forget it.”
We stared into each other’s eyes, the air between us thick with emotion and arousal. His hand slid down my waist and his grip hardened. He brushed his lips over mine, causing my mouth to tingle. Finally he responded with one word that sent shivers cascading down my spine.
“Never.”
CHAPTER 19
There was no mistaking the determination in Logan’s eyes when I shot one last glance over my shoulder before fleeing inside my flat. I’d hurried out of his flat only to find he’d followed me. He stood in his doorway, saying nothing because his eyes said everything.
Logan MacLeod wanted me.
Logan MacLeod was determined to have me.
I’d slammed my door shut behind me with the hope of slamming that look behind me as well. But I couldn’t shake his expression from my mind. There was a part of me that was thrilled. It would be foolish to deny that I wasn’t. I was only human, and the man I’d previously fallen in love with had told me he’d wanted me all along. There was a triumph in that. However, the triumph was overwhelmed by my fear.
There had been many times in the past when I’d been ready to give up on my hellish family, but then my father, Mr. Neglectful, would suddenly show an interest in me, manipulate me, and I was right back in their fold again. Sometimes I worried that the only reason I’d stayed away from them for so long was because my father had given up on me as much as I’d given up on him and them.