My h*ps jerked at the first touch of his thumb on my clit, and he made deep, soothing noises from the back of his throat. And then he was kissing me, wet and drugging kisses as he played with my clit. I touched him too, caressing his shoulders, his back, his abs, strumming at his ni**les in a way that made him growl into my mouth and press hard on my clit.
When he slipped two fingers inside me, I broke the kiss, moaning as my neck arched.
“Baby…” He peppered kisses along my jaw as he thrust his fingers in and out. “God, babe, you’re f**king soaked.”
I made whimpering sounds, my eyes fluttering open to meet his.
“You want me?” he murmured darkly against my mouth.
I nodded, jerking my h*ps against his fingers, needing more.
“Say it, Hannah.”
Mindless, I dug my fingers into his back, urging him closer, the sound of my panting filling the room. “I need you,” I admitted breathlessly. “I want you inside me.”
Just like that, I watched his control snap.
His fingers slipped out of me, he gripped my thigh as he braced his other hand at the side of my head. Looking deeply into my eyes, he moved. I felt him hot and hard against my center and then suddenly there was pressure as he pushed inside.
I stiffened, the feeling not quite as uncomfortable as I remembered it from the first time.
Marco wasn’t even all the way inside me when something new entered his eyes, an incredulous question. His jaw clenched with control, he slowed to a stop. “Babe…?”
I shook my head, not understanding what was wrong.
“Babe…” He dipped his head closer, his hand cupping my face. “You’re tight as a virgin,” he whispered hoarsely.
Oh, no. No, no, no!
I swallowed hard, the arousal slowly dissipating as reality intruded. “It’s just been a while.” I pushed absentmindedly at his shoulders.
Marco’s answer to that was to thrust deeper into me. I gripped his shoulders instead, my h*ps jerking up for more.
“How long is a while?” he asked, the muscle in his jaw flexing with tension.
I sought for a plausible lie. “First year, uni,” I panted. “I’ve been busy since then.”
Marco stilled. “You’ve not had a man in four years?”
Five, actually.
I shook my head again.
He suddenly shuttered his expression so I couldn’t read his reaction. And then I didn’t care about reading him because he pushed all the way inside me before pulling back and then slowly thrusting in again.
The discomfort melted away as my inner muscles clamped around his cock. “Oh, God, Marco!” I tried to pull him in deeper.
“Yeah?” He thrust a little harder and I cried out his name again.
He made love to me. Our eyes stayed connected as he glided in and out of me slowly.
“Come for me, babe,” he growled, taking hold of one of my hands and pinning it to the bed while his other hand gripped my thigh harder. “Hannah, I need you to come.”
The feeling inside me was building upward in a spiral, coiling tighter and tighter until my whole body tensed over a precipice.
“Yeah.” Marco thrust harder. “Come for me.”
His c**k moved inside me a few more times, desperate to light the match… and then it did.
It sparked, the tension inside of me exploding, an orgasm unlike any I’d ever had before flowing through me. I think my eyes even rolled back in my head as I cried out to God.
I shuddered against Marco, opening my eyes to watch as he stiffened, his neck arched, his teeth gritted, and his eyes fierce as his own cl**ax rolled through him.
He jerked against me, his hold on me almost painful as he came. He collapsed on me. His body still shuddered as he buried his head in my neck.
My muscles were warm and languid and for a few glorious seconds I just lay there enjoying the aftermath of the most amazing orgasm I’d ever experienced, and exulting at the feel of Marco’s warm, hard body covering mine.
Those seconds quickly passed, however.
When he raised his head, his features relaxed, and his eyes filled with affection, a dark, heavy feeling began to sneak into my gut. He kissed me softly and I kissed him back, but…
He pulled gently out of me and rolled off me. The feeling in my gut grew bigger as he got out of bed. My eyes took in his long, muscled back, zeroing in on a line of raised skin on the left side of his lower back. A scar.
A new feeling of unease met the one that was already growing inside me. I watched as his magnificent body, bite-worthy arse and all, crossed the room and disappeared into the hall.
A few seconds later he returned, completely at ease with his na**dness. Wishing I could believe in the softness in his eyes as he looked at me, I watched on, a little perplexed, as he crawled back into bed with me. And then he pressed a wet washcloth between my legs.
Surprised by the sweet gesture, I bit my lip to keep myself from saying anything as he took care of me. Afterward he disappeared for a few seconds again, returning to draw down the covers that were under me so he could put them over me. He slipped into bed, lying on his back, and his arm came around me. Without saying a word he pulled me into his side and I rested my head on his chest, my heart racing again.
“I don’t know if this changes anything.”
Marco replied on a huff of laughter, “Of course it does.”
For some reason I wanted to cry. I didn’t understand myself at all. “I should be lying here feeling happy, but… I’m not.”
The air in the room grew chilled. Marco sat up, turning so he could look me in the eye. I could tell by the hardening of his jaw that he was more than a little pissed off by my reaction to us having sex. “What the hell does that mean?”
I went for honesty. Well… sort of. “I have this sinking feeling about us.” I looked away. “I haven’t told you everything, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to.”
I felt the press of his fingers against my chin and he slowly turned my head so I had to meet his blazing gaze. “You will, eventually,” he said with a certainty I just couldn’t feel. “I haven’t told you everything either, but we’ll get there. And that feeling… I’ll make that go away. I’ll make that go away by proving to you that I’m not going away. I’m here, Hannah. And I want to be here.”
I wanted to argue further, I wanted to run far away before everything between us imploded and left me devastated. But when he kissed me, pushing me back against the pillows, determined to make love to me all over again, I understood that there was a much bigger part of me that had nothing to do with my brain and everything to do with my emotions, and it wanted this here with him even more.
The staff room was emptying out with only five minutes to go until lunch was over. I’d just walked to the sink to rinse my mug, still in a daze (and exhausted) from last night’s sexathon with Marco, when Nish hurried over to my side.
She ignored my questioning gaze to look over her shoulder. As soon as the last teacher walked out of the staff room she turned back to me, her dark eyes sparkling with excitement. “I heard things are going well with you and Marco.”
Annoyance made my pulse speed up. “And where did you hear that?”
Nish shrugged, looking weirdly smug, almost triumphant. “Well, Marco sent me a text this morning and all it said was ‘Thank you.’ Seeing the dark circles under your eyes, the flush in your cheeks, and putting it together with the cryptic text message, I can only conclude you two had sex.”
Great. “Are you an English teacher or a private detective?” I grumbled.
Nish laughed. “I don’t know what that grumpiness is for. If I was getting some from Marco D’Alessandro I’d die a happy woman.”
“You’re a married woman,” I reminded her, throwing my sandwich packet in the bin as I headed toward the door.
“That doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate a gorgeous specimen like Marco.”
I was admittedly confused over whether or not giving in to Marco the night before had been the right thing to do, but I had definitely enjoyed everything about his body. I shivered just remembering it.
“So.” Nish reached past me, putting her hand on the staff room door so I couldn’t escape. “Andy says he’s known Marco for a few years now and he’s never chased after a woman before.” Nish grinned at me. “He’s usually a love ’em and leave ’em kind of guy.”
I stared back at her impatiently. “Was that a question?”
“Well, yeah.”
Sighing, I pulled at the door so she had to move back to let me out. “We have history.”
“I’m getting that. What I want to know is, is it serious? Will I be hearing wedding bells soon?”
My shoulders hunched at the absurd question. “I’m not even sure if we’re together, Nish. Marco’s never been one for permanence.”
Cole was in his kitchen, grabbing me a glass of soda and some snacks, and I was just relaxing when my phone vibrated. I pulled it out of my purse, that unease back in my stomach when I saw it was Marco.
He’d called me five times and I’d ignored every single one. I’d also ignored the text message he’d sent. Instead of going home, where I was sure he’d only ambush me and force me to work out my feelings before I was ready, I’d gotten the bus to Cole’s flat on Leith Walk. It was a small place that he shared with a roommate. The furniture was worn and in need of replacement, the walls were yellow-stained, and it was perpetually cold because the old sash-and-case windows needed replacing
Shoving my phone back in my purse, I looked up as Cole returned to the sitting room. “Do you miss living with Cam and Jo?” I asked, gratefully taking the food and drink he offered me.
Cole shot me an “are you serious?” look. “I like the privacy. For all of us. Cam can’t keep his hands off my sister, as evident by that huge bump she’s carrying around these days, and that’s just something I’m glad I don’t have to walk in on anymore.”
I chuckled, glancing around the room. My gaze stuck on a plaque that hung above the old fireplace. On the plaque was a singing fish. “Still, your flatmate has the dodgiest taste.”
“Bigsie is dodgy, full stop.” Cole stared grimly at the fish. “Luckily I don’t see much of him.”
“Yeah, where is he?”
“Fuck knows. He pays the rent on time, that’s all that matters.”
“You could ask him to take the fish down.”
“The fish?” Cole snorted. “I take it you haven’t seen the blow-up doll in my bathroom?”
I burst out laughing. “No way.”
Cole closed his eyes as if he was in pain and nodded.
Giggling, I put my Coke down and scampered out of the sitting room and down the hall into the pokey wee bathroom at the back of the flat. As soon as I opened the door I was confronted by a life-size blow-up doll. She was sporting a cartoon face and a majestic bosom, and someone had covered her lower half with a hula skirt.
“Her name is Lola!” Cole called.
Laughing, I took a photo of it on my camera phone and then strode back to the sitting room.
Cole rolled his eyes at my expression. “It’s funny for you. You don’t have to live with it. I’d seriously consider deflating her if I wasn’t worried about Bigsie’s retaliation.”
I giggled harder.
“Come on.” Cole huffed. “Where’s the sympathy? How am I supposed to explain that to a woman if I bring her back here?”
I shrugged. “You have a weird flatmate.”
“Nah, if we’re being serious here they’ll be out the door before I even get the chance to explain. Would you not be if you saw that in some guy’s bathroom?”
I sniggered. “Oh, God, yeah.”
“Fucking great,” Cole muttered into his coffee.
My phone vibrated again and I studiously ignored it, reaching for my Coke.
“Are you not going to answer that?”
I shook my head.
“Okay.” Cole eyed me carefully. “We’ve barely hung out in weeks, which is fine because you seem to be making progress with Marco. But now you’re here, after work, avoiding phone calls. What’s up with that? Is it him?”
“You don’t want to know.”
I felt Cole’s scrutiny intensify. He sighed, putting his mug down on the chipped coffee table. “You slept with him.”
My lips parted at his perceptive deduction. “Annoying.”
“So you slept with him. It was that bad you’re ignoring him… like the mature adult you are?”
“It wasn’t bad,” I muttered, feeling my cheeks blaze at just the memory of it.
“Ach, I don’t want to hear that.” Cole’s face scrunched up like he’d just popped a sour apple candy into his mouth.
“I didn’t say anything.”
He waved his hand. “Forget the details. Why are you avoiding him?”
“I’m just trying to figure things out.”
“And what is there to figure out? I thought you were giving him a second chance?”
“Am I?” My brows drew together.
Cole smiled kindly. “Hannah, you let him back in.”
I nodded, knowing that was true and that, yes, I was preparing myself to give him a second chance but… “I just have this feeling. I can’t get past it. It’s this feeling in my gut that this time I’m going to get crushed to the point I can’t get back up again.”
My friend exhaled heavily. “You want to know what I think?”