“You are so going to get grounded again.”
Alex threw both hands over his heart. “Who? Me? But I’m an angel.”
I knew he was just teasing, but my curiosity was piqued. “Are you really?”
“Am I really what?”
“An angel.”
Alex craned his neck over one shoulder and then the other. “I don’t see any wings…”
I kicked some rocks in his general direction. “Don’t be a smarty pants.” I felt a little stupid for asking. After all, when I was here, he just felt like Alex. The idea of him hanging out on white fluffy clouds, wearing hippie sandals, and playing a harp was beyond stupid. But what were the other options? He’s dead. Really, truly dead. There may have been some doubt in my mind in the beginning, especially when I thought the wolf stalking me was Alex instead of Liam, but even then I think a part of me knew he was really gone. So, when a dead boy is still having conversations with living folks he’s either an angel or a ghost, right? “I just don’t understand how this can happen. Are you in heaven now? Is this heaven? Or is it like some in between place where the living and dead can coexist?”
Alex plopped down on the ground. “You ask too many questions.”
I sat down beside him, although in a slightly more dignified fashion. “You don’t answer nearly enough.” It must be a genetics thing. He and Liam were certainly two peas in a pod when it came to telling me stuff.
Since he couldn’t really argue the point, he just smiled and plated a tiny kiss on my temple. We sat there, side by side, for a long time, not saying anything as we watched Nicole chase butterflies.
“How have you been?” he asked after a while.
I lifted my face up to the sun whose warmth I shouldn’t have been able to feel. “What? You don’t get to spy down on me from your lofty perch? No crystal balls wherever it is you go when you’re not here?”
“You know how sometimes your parents will ground you from your phone, and sometimes they ground you from going out with your friends, and sometimes you’re so grounded you’re not allowed to even think about leaving your bedroom?”
“Never happened to me, but I remember those things happening to Jase.”
“I was so grounded I couldn’t even think about thinking about leaving my bedroom. No contact with anyone. No one told me what was going on. They let me know you survived the Alphas, but that was it. I don’t know where you’ve been or what’s happened since the last time I saw you.”
“I’ve been spending a lot of time with your brother.” I picked up a pebble and rolled it through my fingers. “Remember when you told me that if we got to know each other we would end up being friends?”
“I remember saying something to that effect.”
I let the pebble fall back to the ground. “You were so remarkably wrong it’s not even funny.”
Alex’s eyebrows knitted together. “What happened?”
I ended up telling him all of it. I told him about the trial, and the one-two punch of having both Mrs. Matthews and Jase turn on me. I told him about the epic battle to get me free. I even tried to outline our entire road trip, though I couldn’t quite remember everywhere we went or the order in which we got there. “And now we’re part of the Latino Bloods or Mexican Crypts or whatever gang Diaz is running.” I took a deep breath and looked out over the lake, keeping Alex’s face in my peripheral view. “Liam is carrying on the Cole tradition and won’t tell me what is going on. He told me it’s none of my business, that I’m just a pawn.”
“You are not a pawn.” When I kept my focus on the lake where the sun was both rising and setting, Alex took my chin in his fingers and turned my face to his. “You’re not a pawn, Scout. Yes, this is something big. It’s bigger than you or me or Liam, but that doesn’t mean you’re not important. You’re hugely important, and not just for the part you’re supposed to play. To me, Talley, Charlie, your family, and tons of other people, Liam included, you’re important because you’re Scout. We care about you and believe in you. We’re putting our faith and the future in your hands.”
I looked down at the hands in question. Half my nails were broken and there were stains from making the kids Jell-O. “I’m pretty sure you screwed up there.”
His smile was radiant. “Not possible.”
“Your devotion borders on insanity. You know that, right?”
He just kept smiling. “Give Liam a chance, okay? He carries the weight of the world on his shoulders and has some trust issues. It’ll take time.”
It would take a miracle. “I’ll try.”
“That’s all anyone can do.” He squinted at the sun. The day had already turned into morning, something only possible in this crazy place. “You’re going to wake up soon.”
“I know.”
“But I’ll be back.”
It was my turn to smile and surrender to faith. “I know.”
***
When I woke up, I felt light and happy. I smiled throughout the day, even when the baby’s diaper exploded all over her clothes. Okay, maybe I didn’t exactly smile during that horrific experience, but I didn’t scream or panic, so there was a definite improvement.
As the full moon started approaching again, I found myself drifting back towards Liam. I was still frustrated, angry, and confused, but Wolf Scout missed her friend. I think the same must have held true for Wolf Liam, because in the days leading up to the full moon he began showing something that could’ve been mistaken for kindness. By the time we were in a borrowed car driving out to find a place to run, I could actually stand to be around him for more than five minute at a time.
That night was much like the first time we ran together. Wolf Scout took over almost completely without Talley there to rein her in, and food being of the kill it and eat it variety. Liam and I spent the majority of the night alternating between pouncing on one another in surprise attacks and nuzzling our noses into each other’s necks. The most amazing part of the night was I somehow slept through part of the Change. Liam and I had curled ourselves into a miniature wolf pile after we ate our fill of squirrels for the night. I thought I would just lay there and rest up a bit, but I found myself waking up in immense pain. It took a few moments for my brain to process what was happening, but once I realized I was Changing back, it was almost over.