It was then that I became the strong, uncaring Thalia. I had to prove myself to everyone and close off any emotion. I became the strongest advocate against Denai and impure bloodlines, even though deep down there was always the fear that I would always be different, mistreated like my mother.
The memories, one by one, flew back as if I was reliving my life from childhood to adulthood in slow motion. I felt myself gag, as I was overwhelmed with the knowledge of how much self-loathing I had for Denai and myself. The hatred was strong and deep. My eyes couldn't focus and I grabbed my head and waited for it all to stop.
Breathing in a deep breath, I looked at my uncle. “It was you at the river that day, not my father.” I stated, feeling myself go nauseous at the thought that I was there when my own mother was murdered. “You killed her.”
Rayneld’s eyes opened in disbelief and then he chuckled in pleasure. “Ah, so you do remember.” He turned back towards me. “Yes, I killed her and I tried to get rid of you. But you came back.” My neck hairs went on end as he talked and I let him, because I needed to know everything he knew. “They promised me you would experience great pain and wouldn't live through the process. They lied, because here you are, back to plague me again.”
“Who?” I asked him. “Who was it that you gave me to?”
It was coming back; I remembered everything from the night that I disappeared months ago, or almost everything. Bvork had refilled my tankard of honey mead for me during our feast. An act that made me raise my eyebrows in question, but one that made him throw his head back in laughter.
“Relax, cousin.” He gestured to his own in an offertory salute. “A toast to the future clan leader, I heard Fenri talking to your father. Your future looks secure.”
Warily, I clanked mugs with him and drank down my drink. A few minutes later, I began to feel light headed and fuzzy.
Something was wrong with my drink and I stumbled out of the main hall and tried to make my way home. Bvork met me and led me into the woods, where Rayneld was waiting. Slowly, my limbs felt like lead and my body began to go numb. Even my consciousness began to fade in and out.
There were more men in the forest and I remember seeing red robes and horses. A gag was placed in my mouth and a bag that smelled faintly of flour was placed over my head and tied around my neck. I could still hear and I heard the sound of a moneybag exchanging hands and Rayneld and another talking.
“She won't remember anything,” a low voice injected. “As long as she drank all of the serum.”
“Are you sure she's what you’re looking for?” Rayneld asked.
“If she's from the bloodline you think she is from, and she carries any of their blood, then she will do,” the low voice replied too low to determine actual gender.
“That's fine. Just as long as you promise that she will never show up here again.”
“That would be inconvenient for your plans, wouldn't it?” The gender-neutral voice chuckled. “Few rarely survive our...how can I put this, um… delicate process.”
Deftly, with my hands tied and feeling weighted down from the drugs, I was hefted over someone’s lap on a horse and the saddle pommel dug painfully into my rib cage. I gasped for breath as the horses took off into the woods and my head slammed against the side of the horse and everything went black.
I awoke a good deal later; it could have been hours or days, because I was still in a drug filled haze. But I opened my eyes to the putrid smelling laboratory, as I was being strapped into the iron butterfly for the first time and had my first glimpse of the Raven wearing the silver mask. All of the hated and suppressed memories came flooding back.
Tears burned my eyes and dripped onto the ground and I screamed in rage at my Uncle Rayneld. “How could you?”