Thank you, she mouthed to the other woman.
Olivia winked, then turned back to Bram. "Sabelle isn't with Ice. Most of the warriors have reconvened to run down the details of Tynan's rescue. Any word from Shock? Do you know where to find Mathias or if he's taken the bait?"
"No. If the warriors have reconvened, any chance Duke joined them?"
"Nope, and I don't know where he is." The other woman shrugged. "Not my department. If you all want a hot meal before you go, then I've got to get to the kitchen."
With that, Olivia slid out of the room.
"Cheeky wench," Bram muttered. "If she wasn't destined to be a powerful witch someday, I'd toss her out on her ear."
No, he wouldn't. Felicia heard his fondness for the other woman. The grousing was simply his bad mood talking.
Bram raked his hand through his mussed golden hair. "Where the hell did Duke go?"
So, he was back to that? "I told you, he left without a word shortly after the words were spoken."
Bram turned a prying blue gaze on her. "It doesn't fucking make sense. If he tried to seduce you, what happened?"
Felicia stiffened. "No one said sleeping with him would be required. As Olivia pointed out, I'm still engaged to his brother."
The wizard clutched the arm of the couch, looking as if he'd rather be clutching her neck. "A promise to make a vow to someone isn't more important than the vow you have made. You promised from that moment on there was no other for you but Duke."
"Temporarily! It's not as if I've spent my evening having sex with Mason. I haven't broken the vow. But I'll be damned if you're going to force me to disregard the promise I chose to make in favor of the one Fate forced me to."
"Listen up, little girl," Bram growled. "You'd better--"
"Leave her alone."
The deadly command sliced across the room, and Felicia looked up. Hurstgrove.
Her chest tightened at the mere sight of him. Fresh snow dusted the shoulders of his dark coat and hair. He needed a shave, but that somehow added to his appeal. He vibrated with strength and looked beyond brassed off.
Bram stood. His gaze traced Hurstgrove, then he exploded. "Where the fuck have you been?"
Anger on his behalf flooded her. "Don't yell at him!"
"This is at least half your fault for refusing to lie with your mate. Don't butt in unless you're prepared to be helpful."
Deadly calm settled over Hurstgrove's features. "You'll treat her with respect. Or I will take your head off."
"You mated then left? You might have asked someone if speaking the words had changed your signature before you trotted outside where Mathias or any of his goons could see you."
Hurstgrove paused. "Did it?"
"Little has changed."
Gritting his teeth, Hurstgrove cursed. "It must have worked. I felt something.
There is some bond."
"It's barely discernable," Bram grated out. "You should have checked with one of us before leaving."
"After I Called to Felicia and she said the Binding, I searched for you and the others to check my signature. You were closeted with your surrogate. All those with mates were behind locked doors. Lucan had gone." He shrugged off his coat, then shot her a guarded stare. "I thought it best to ... clear up unfinished business before we go after Tynan."
He wasn't lying, but Felicia frowned at his terminology. What wasn't he saying?
"With your signature skewed, I can't tell your energy level."
Hurstgrove's expression closed up. "I'm fine."
Felicia's breathing skidded to a stop. His energy level ... attained through sex. Had he acquired it before he'd abducted her or--? She didn't finish her question. But it didn't matter. The notion that he might have touched someone else tonight plunged a knife straight into her heart.
Felicia couldn't conceal her gasp of betrayal. "You've had sex with another woman?"
"No." His clenched fists and a light acrid scent stung around the edges of his words.
He wasn't lying ... but he wasn't telling the complete truth.
"You went to a surrogate." Bram sounded exasperated. "Bloody hell! We needed to ensure this mating was solid, and instead, you deferred to Felicia's fucking delicate sensibilities and found a substitute for the real thing."
Felicia felt her chest cave in under the pressure of debilitating pain. On the magical equivalent of their wedding night, he'd spent it with another woman? Her ability to breathe ceased for long moments, and she was stunned.
Hurstgrove shouldn't mean a thing to her. But faced with this, she knew better.
Why did he affect her so deeply? The man who had sacrificed his standing with his family, tainted his image, given her the magical equivalent of his name, and agreed to fight the most evil of enemies to protect her meant more to her than she'd realized. More than was wise.
"How could you?" The words fell from her lips. A whisper. An accusation.
To reproach him wasn't fair, and she knew it. Yes, they were mated--or mostly so--but he needed energy. She'd refused to provide it, all but made him promise not to touch her. Felicia knew she shouldn't be shocked that he'd turned to another, but the strength of her pain nearly undid her. She wanted him so badly, and could not act on it unless she wanted to betray Mason and risk her heart.
Her feelings weren't logical, she knew. She'd given Hurstgrove few choices. What the hell did she expect?
Hurstgrove glared at Bram. "Are you fucking happy now?"
"Are you?" Bram returned. "Take her. She's yours now. You need to--"
"You don't know a damn thing," Hurstgrove growled. "You trampled all over her feelings with absolutely no thought for how much it could hurt her."
"No," Felicia's voice trembled. " You did that when you got naked with another woman."
"Those in a mate bond are unable to have sex with anyone else while mated. I did not have intercourse with her." He crossed the room and took her shoulders in his grip, tightening on her when she tried to pull away. "I would ten times have rather made love to you. If you'd like to now, I'm more than ready."
Felicia paused. The unvarnished truth. Really, what had she expected him to do?
Not this, something in her whimpered. She had no right to be upset ... and yet she couldn't turn off the anger and feeling of betrayal.
"Get the deed done," Bram demanded. "It's the only hope we have of changing her imprint. Both of us together couldn't hurt her as badly as Mathias will if he finds her through you. I realize you don't want to betray your brother. But if you want Felicia alive--"
"Stop playing the same trump card. It's bloody annoying me."
"You tiptoeing around her feelings is doing the same to me."
"Leave us," Felicia demanded. Bram opened his mouth to object, and she plowed ahead. "Stop whatever you're going to say. We know what you want. This is a matter for us to sort out."
Bram glared at her, then scoured Hurstgrove with a scowl. "Fine. The rest of us will see if we can draw Mathias out and save Tynan. Duke, you're staying here. As long as you're carrying her imprint, you can't be seen. We'll be back in a few hours."
With that, Bram slammed out the door. One sort of tension drained away, but Felicia felt another cramp her stomach, this one sexual.
"So the mating didn't work?" She wanted to clarify that point before they said another word.
"Something happened. My signature hasn't altered enough, but you're certain that Shock didn't lie. Assuming his knowledge is accurate ..."
"Can we assume that? Do we have any other sources that might corroborate him?"
"Not unless Sabelle finds something in Merlin's books."
"I'll help her look."
"Regardless of what you find, those words we spoke changed me." His fingers tightened on her shoulders, and his dark eyes drilled into her, earnest and demanding at once. "Like all wizards, I have no interest in any female except my mate."
He wasn't lying. He had engaged in some sexual act with the other woman because his kind required energy she had refused to give him. She'd left him no choice, but the fact he'd gone to another without talking to her hurt. An odd mixture of fury, guilt, pain, and desire flooded her chest. Tears stung her eyes like acid. She swallowed them back.
"I've put you in a terrible position." Her voice trembled, and she hated that she couldn't control it. "I'm sorry. I've ruined your life and--"
"Stop." Hurstgrove pulled her closer. "I'm exactly where I want to be. I wouldn't wish away any of this except Mathias painting a target on your back. I know you love Mason ..."
But she didn't. Felicia bit her lip. Telling Hurstgrove the truth might absolve him of some of the guilt he'd experienced in doing all he had to save her.
"He ... loves me," she whispered.
Hurstgrove dropped his hand and stepped back. "I know."
She reached up, snagged his sleeve. Even that small touch sent staggering heat blasting through her. Her need for him grew every hour, and Felicia wondered how much longer she could fight it.
"He's my best friend," she whispered.
He stared hard, scanning her face, delving deep into her eyes. "Are you in love with him?"
Hurstgrove moved closer, and she shivered.
Love was too painful when someone left. Deirdre had shown her the despair a broken heart could inflict. She'd been transformed from a vibrant woman to a hollow shell, gouged by need and torment, her confidence shattered, her sanity tested. Her will to live had been ultimately stolen. Felicia didn't want to care about Hurstgrove. But she feared it was too late.
He had sacrificed so much to keep her safe, how could she lie?
"I love him ... as a friend." She closed her eyes, knowing these words would change everything, but she owed him honesty. "I thought he cared for me in the same way. But moments before you appeared at our wedding, he told me his feelings went deeper."
With a frown, Hurstgrove barged further into her personal space. "Why would you marry a man you aren't in love with? Are you pregnant?"
"No! I want a family someday, but Mason admitting that he loved me was a shock I wasn't prepared for. I-I wasn't even certain if I should go on with the ceremony."
He brushed his fingers across her cheek, and her eyes fluttered open. "Why don't you want him to be in love with you?"
Felicia struggled with the answer. Talking about Deirdre was so ... painful.
Personal. Opening up to Hurstgrove any further would only bring them closer.
"It doesn't matter. Nothing changes Mason's feelings or the fact we've already betrayed him. Anything more we do is merely twisting the knife in his wound."
"You don't think that denying what's between us isn't hurting me? I think it even hurts you. Is this really how you want it?"
God, no. In that moment, Felicia realized Mason was still her best friend ... and her best excuse. The real truth was that she was too terrified to gamble her untried heart on Hurstgrove. Yes, he had feelings for her now. But would they last any longer than Alexei's feelings for Deirdre? Hurstgrove would be so easy to fall for--and so hard to get over. Why sign up to get her heart crushed? Just because magic temporarily bound them, didn't ensure that whatever he felt would last once the danger had passed.
"Right now," she murmured, "we have to deal with the situation at hand, not the mess of our feelings. We mated but your magical signature did not change. Bram suggests that consummating our union would, perhaps, do the trick. But Mason has done so much for me over the years and wanted to marry me, despite the fact I don't return his feelings. I can't betray him."
"This isn't about Mason, but your fear." He pulled her closer. "And why I scare you."
Felicia's heart pounded. She tore from his grasp and backed toward the door.
"Hurstgrove, I--"
"Goddamnit, my name is Simon!" He gripped her tightly, his breaths rough, deep.
"I don't know what the hell you're running from, Felicia, but now that I know you don't love Mason, I have no qualms about telling you, my mate, that you're more important to me than anything or anyone, even my brother. I won't rest until your heart is mine. "
Chapter 10
She doesn't love Mason.
Those words reverberated in Duke's head as a wide-eyed Felicia backed away from him, terror etched across her delicate face. She shuddered as she retreated another step. "You want my h-heart? No. You need energy, want ... sex. You--"
He stepped closer, grabbed her shoulders. "Want more from you than sex. Far more."
"I-It's the mating. Those words made you feel something that isn't real."
If that's what Felicia thought, he had news for her. "No, I've felt this way since I shook your hand the day we met. It's you."
She gaped at him. "And you think you want my ... love?"
"I won't settle for less."
His words seemed to suck the air from her lungs, and she looked ready to bolt.
Duke did the one thing he prayed would remind her how good they could be together: He kissed her.