How much of a head start did Jack have? Surely I could reach the army in a couple of hours. The convoy would be hauling trailers, and the roads sucked. I could follow the wheel ruts.
Jack had no idea how much I loved him. I’d never even said the words, “I love you” to him. The urgency I felt to reach him, to tell him, strangled me.
When I careened into the stable, my poor mare’s expression: Oh, for fuck’s sake.
I saddled her in record time, then tore out of the gate. Shit, the mines! How to get around them? I knew about where they were.
I spotted tracks in the frozen mud. Thanatos’s hoofprints. Using them to reach Jack didn’t seem fair; I still did.
Past the mines and rock forest, I followed the river toward the bridge.
In the distance, I saw Death atop a rise, his shoulders back, his helmet off, his pale hair blowing in the wind.
Even from here, even amidst my panic, I felt his longing. In another lifetime, I could have been happy with him. In another lifetime, perhaps I would be.
With tears threatening once more, I turned from him. Don’t look back, Evie, don’t look back. He’d see it as some kind of sign. As encouragement. I knew this.
But I wanted one last glimpse of the man who’d turned my existence inside out. We locked gazes, his eyes like stars.
Time seemed to slow. I thought of the tattoos on his chest and his centuries of longing. Now he knew what he was missing. He’d told me the week we’d been apart had been gut-wrenching; I was leaving him for the rest of this lifetime. Banishing him to a place of nothingness.
How could he endure it?
Doubt filled me. No, I loved Jack. I was going to be with Jack. I would focus on the road ahead, on the future. Instead of the past.
When I dragged my gaze from Aric, his blood-curdling roar echoed across the countryside.
I pressed the back of my hand against my mouth, stifling a sob as I reached the bridge. Speeding across Circe’s abyss, I gave her tears in toll. . . .
For over an hour, I rode, checking the radio’s reception at every rise. Uninterrupted static.
I thought I spied a snowflake, wafting down like a petal. Probably just more ash—
No, there was another. And another. Real snow! This had to be a good sign. If the world couldn’t yet improve, at least it could change.
If the sun could disappear, it could reappear.
I tried the radio again. Nothing.
The flakes grew into a flurry. Soon a layer of snow stuck to the ground, painting it white. Did the air feel fresher? Fluffy down blanketed soot, and I welcomed it, even as riding became precarious.
Was Aric seeing the snow? Did it remind him of his childhood home in the north? I could scarcely comprehend that I would never see him again.
Every other minute, a snowflake would hit one of my eyes directly, the sting blurring my vision. I would blink to clear my eyes, and a detail from one of my last encounters with Death would blossom in my mind.
His hooded gaze as he’d said, “Can you comprehend what it’s like to touch her after so long without? For this bliss, I’ll risk the bullet. I’ll take a bullet.”
Blink.
The way his hands had shaken when he’d held me, as if I was the most delicate and precious thing in the entire world. “. . . you must know that you have my love. It’s given, sievā–. Wholly entrusted to you. Have a care with it.”
Blink.
His murmurs late in the night: “There’s so much about the game I could teach you. So much about life you could teach me. Let’s begin this, little wife.”
Blink. Blink. Blink. My tears mingled with crystalline snow. . . .
Time passed, the landscape becoming rockier, icier, white fluff obscuring the trail.
I passed an abandoned mine entrance—never welcome—and increased my speed even more. How long had I gone without checking the radio? I urged the mare up a steep grade. “Go, go!” At the top, I pressed the talk button. “Jack? Please answer me!”
“Evie? . . . can’t . . . you.”
“I’m coming for you!” Down the slippery hill I went, the mare’s hooves skidding on ice. Spurring the horse, I crested a higher rise. “Can you hear me?”
From this vantage, I could see the army in the far distance! They’d descended into a valley. The lights of the slow-moving convoy looked like a glowworm wending through the snowy dark. But I didn’t see a trail down.
“Bébé? Where are you?”
“I can see the Azey trucks! I’m on the rise looking over the valley!”
“You coming with me, peekôn?” he rasped. “For true, you chose Ole Jack?”
“Like you could get rid of me that easily, Cajun.” I grinned madly, convinced I’d made the right decision. “I don’t ever want to be apart again.”
I heard Selena in the background saying, “Told you it would work, dumbass.” She sounded like her eye-rolling self. As ever, she was by his side, watching his six. “We should go get her before she breaks her stupid neck.”
I’d better get used to the Archer, because apparently, she’d be living in New Acadiana with me and Jack, Matthew and Gran. “I can ride to you.” I held my hand over my eyes, squinting against the snow. “Just tell me the best way down.”
“Non, you stay put!” Jack quickly said. “The way’s icy. I know where you are; we’re coming to you!”
“Okay, I’ll be here.” I couldn’t stop smiling. This was why we fought to survive. For love.