"I'm not going to. Please don't contact me again."
He smiled—a smile obviously calculated to melt her stony heart. "I refuse to believe you're serious. Okay, you have a right to be angry, but I can't divorce Georgia. It would devastate her. But if that's the only way I can have you, then—"
Grace raised her hand to stop him. She'd heard enough, more than enough. "Go. Just go."
He frowned again, like a petulant child, but finally left. All of a sudden Grace started to shake. Her knees felt like they were about to give way and she sank into the folding chair in the animal shelter booth. Gently stroking the kitten on her lap, she closed her eyes and took in several calming breaths.
"Grace."
She opened her eyes to find Cliff standing there. "Are you all right?" he asked. "You look pale."
"I'm fine," she lied. She'd hoped he'd come here today, wished for just this moment, but not immediately after a confrontation with Will.
"No, you're not fine," he said bluntly. "That was Will Jefferson, wasn't it?"
So Cliff had seen her talking to Will. Her first thought was to defend herself, to explain that she wanted nothing more to do with Olivia's brother. Instead, huge tears filled her eyes and trailed down her cheeks.
"You cared about him, didn't you?"
"No," she cried, and knew that was a lie. "Yes... fool that I was. I did care at one time, but not anymore. Oh, Cliff, don't you know? It's you I love. I can't give up on the two of us. I tried to and I'd almost succeeded but then Lisa—"
"You spoke to Lisa?"
Grace winced; she was only making matters worse.
"You and Lisa talked?" he repeated.
Grace nodded, swallowing hard. "She came to see me at the library, and I'm so grateful she did."
"What did she say?"
Grace stared down at the sleeping kitten in her lap. "She said you loved me, too."
He dropped into a crouch so they were at eye-level and tucked his finger beneath her chin. "That was when you started this e-mail campaign, wasn't it?"
She nodded again. She wondered if her barrage of messages had succeeded. This was the first time they'd actually talked face-to-face, and she wanted to throw her arms around his neck. Well, except for the kitten, of course...
Cliff held her gaze for the longest moment before looking away.
"Did it work?" she whispered.
At first she didn't think he was going to answer, but then he gave her a lightning-quick smile. "You're a difficult woman to ignore."
"I am?" Her heart was jumping inside her chest. "Really?"
"Before I knew it, I was hurrying to the mailbox every day and logging on to my computer, hoping there'd be a note from you."
The Internet was part of what had gotten her into this mess. It was only fitting that it should be a means of getting back what she'd lost.
"Are you willing to give me another chance?" she asked, holding her breath for fear of what he might say.
"We can begin slowly."
She bit her lower lip. "Thank you."
Cliff wiped the tears from her cheeks. "How about if we have a cup of coffee and talk once you're finished here?"
Grace nodded, so happy she was afraid she'd start crying again. Maybe they could attend Charlotte's wedding together. She hardly dared hope....
Forty-One
Cecilia knocked lightly on her employer's open door. Mr. Cox glanced up from his paperwork, smiling when he saw her.
"I wanted to remind you that I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon," she said.
Zachary Cox's gaze went to his appointment calendar. "Ah, yes, I see that now. As it happens, Rosie and I are taking the afternoon off ourselves."
Her employer had escaped with his wife for several afternoons this summer. Cecilia suspected they were rediscovering the excitement of being in love, the passion of their early years. "Will Allison be coming in today?"
Mr. Cox nodded absently. "Rosie's teaching her how to knit. Her first project is a blanket for your baby."
Cecilia had proudly shared the news of her pregnancy with Allison a week earlier. "That's so sweet of her."
Mr. Cox smiled again. "You've been very good for my daughter, and this is something she wanted to do for you."
All Cecilia had really done was listen to the girl. She'd been going through a difficult time after her parents' divorce, but she seemed to have made a complete turnaround.
"Leave whenever you need to, Cecilia."
"The ultrasound is scheduled for two-thirty."
"Is your husband going with you?" Zach asked.
Cecilia nodded. "He wouldn't miss it for the world."
"Good. I'll see you in the morning then."
Cecilia returned to her desk, her spirits high. Every day was special. The dreaded morning sickness had slowly disappeared, just as it did the first time.
Now that he'd accepted her pregnancy, Ian was a hundred percent supportive, his attitude one of eager anticipation. She felt more confident than ever in her husband's love.
At two-thirty, Ian was waiting for her at the navy hospital, pacing the hallway outside the technician's office.
"I'm here," she said.
Ian hurried over to her. "How are you feeling?"
"All right. Just as important, how are you feeling?"
His grin was so sexy, it was all she could do not to kiss him right then and there. "Excited. We're going to see a picture of our baby."
"I'm excited, too."
He started to open the office door, but Cecilia stopped him. "We should decide now if we want to know the sex of the baby or if we want to wait."
"Do you want to know?" he asked.
"It doesn't matter to me either way."
He agreed. "Me neither." He held open the door for her and they walked into the reception area. Several other expectant mothers, at varying stages of pregnancy, were already waiting.
Cecilia went up to the counter and handed over the necessary paperwork, along with her navy identification. When she'd finished, they sat down next to each other. Ian held her hand and gently rubbed it with his thumb in a soothing, comforting motion. He was nervous, she realized, but then so was she.
It seemed to take forever before her name was called. With a full bladder, she'd found it hard to sit still for that long. But finally it was their turn. Ian entered the inner office with her, after which they were led into the ultrasound room. Once Cecilia was lying on the table, her belly covered with cool gel, she noticed how pale Ian had become. He'd asked to come with her, but now she wondered if this was such a good idea.
"Ian?" Cecilia held out her arm to her husband. His grip was tight as he linked their hands. "Everything's okay."
He nodded. "Of course it is."
The technician, a woman who wore a name tag that identified her as Jody, directed their attention to the monitor. "We should be able to see the baby in just a moment."
As the tiny fetus came into view, Ian rose to his feet to get a better look. "That's our baby?" His voice was filled with surprise and awe.
"That's your baby," Jody said softly, moving the paddle over Cecilia's stomach.
"Is everything all right?" Ian asked. "I mean the baby seems awfully small."
"She'll grow."
"She?" Cecilia repeated.
"I always refer to a fetus as female. Were you hoping for a son?" The question was directed at Ian.
"Either," he answered, staring at the monitor.
"Is this your first child?"
Ian pulled his gaze away from the screen long enough to look at Cecilia. His eyes darkened with pain.
"Our first baby died shortly after she was born," Cecilia explained. "That's the reason Dr. Chalmers ordered the ultra-sound. He wants to be sure there aren't any problems with this pregnancy."
Jody patted Cecilia's hand. "So far everything looks perfectly normal."
It had with Allison too, Cecilia recalled, but she'd only had the one ultrasound in the early stages of her pregnancy and there hadn't seemed to be any need for another. Who could have known? Who could have guessed that her baby would be born with a defective heart?
"I'm so sorry about your first baby." Jody's voice was sympathetic.
Cecilia glanced at Ian and saw that just talking about Allison had stirred painful memories. "We're both a little nervous this time around."
"All we want is a healthy baby," Ian added.
"Of course you do." Jody manipulated the paddle a bit more. "Would you like to know the sex of your child?"
"You can tell this soon?" Ian squinted at the screen, as if that would help him decipher what she saw that he didn't.
"A trained eye can."
Ian squeezed Cecilia's hand. "Should we?" he asked.
"You don't want to be surprised?" If it was solely up to her, she'd prefer to wait, but there were definitely advantages to learning the baby's sex in advance.
"I've decided I do want to know," Ian said eagerly.
"All right, all right, tell us," Cecilia said, laughing.
Jody grinned. "It looks to me like you're having another little girl."
Ian let out a deep, heartfelt sigh. "A girl," he repeated. His hand tightened around Cecilia's to the point that it was painful.
"Ian!"
"Sorry," he said when he realized what he'd done. "A girl. We're having a girl."
Cecilia nodded. She was so excited that she could hardly hold back her emotions. After Allison's death, Cecilia had given away all her daughter's clothes, with two exceptions. She'd saved the outfit she'd planned to bring Allison home in, and a favorite baby blanket she'd purchased shortly before the birth. That was it. The two things she'd saved because it was too emotionally difficult to give everything away.
Following the ultrasound, they went to a movie. Ian held her hand all through the show, as if he needed a constant connection with her. They went out to eat afterward, but because they were saving to buy a house, all their budget would allow was a meal at the PancakePalace.
This was a rare night out and Cecilia chatted lightheart-edly during dinner. Only when Ian reached for the bill did she realize how quiet and somber he'd grown over the course of the evening.
"Ian, you're not worried about the baby, are you?"
His denial came far too quickly. "No, the technician said everything was fine. Why should I be worried?"
"I don't know. Why should you?" she pressed, unwilling to drop the subject.
Her husband looked away and when he returned his gaze to her, his eyes were brimming with pain. "It's just like before."
"What is?"
"First, the pregnancy's a surprise, just the way Allison was a surprise."
"But this is a happy surprise."
Ian agreed willingly enough. "I was ecstatic when you told me you were pregnant with Allison."
"You're happy now, too, aren't you?"
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. "It took some adjusting, but I'm pleased about the baby."
"It is different this time," Cecilia insisted.
"Is it? Has the morning sickness been different?"