“I told you—”
“I know you feel an obligation to protect me. But when I"ve commanded you to your knees, or made you do things you didn"t want to do, it felt like something you wanted, something you couldn"t resist, didn"t it? There"s a craving in the pit of your stomach for more of it, even if you think you don"t want it.”
“You can read my mind,” he said gruffly. “You already know.”
“Yes, and no. I see all those thoughts in your mind, but I don"t know which of them wins the struggle.”
“Some days one side wins, some days the other.”
“So it"s still an ongoing war.” She managed a stiff smile.
“Yeah.” He straightened now. “But if you won"t let me be at your side when you go into dangerous situations, the war will be over pretty quick. It"s the one thing I"m good at, Anwyn.
Don"t deny me the right to protect you with all I have.”
“Even if it gets you killed? I don"t need to see your body cut down to know that you"re willing to die for me. Except I don"t think you"re dying for me. You"re dying for yourself, to prove something to that girl. To Laura.”
He flinched, and she knew she"d hit a direct target. Good. She didn"t mind confronting it head-on. In fact, as her anger built with the whole situation, with the idea of taking him to the Council like a fucking sacrificial lamb, she understood what had fueled Daegan"s rage the day she"d tried to burn herself alive behind the Dumpster. Karma could be a real bitch.
She closed the last space between her and Gideon, her breasts brushing his chest, her hands settling on his taut biceps. It was an intimate pose, but she knew her gaze was as unrelenting as solid ice. “Live for me or die for her, but you make up your damn mind before we leave. If you want her, then you clear out and go find the vampire that can grant your deepest wish. I"m sure Daegan can point you toward the nearest unwinnable, desperately heroic situation. You"re not going to meet the Council with us. And that"s final.”
With that, she swept past him, headed for the corridor that would lead to the weapons room.
For once, she needed to pound on something.
9
CAUGHT between annoyance and something worse, it took several moments before Gideon realized Daegan was still standing in the same place, regarding him with an expression almost as aggravating as Anwyn"s opinion. Hell, why was he angry? He was the one who"d jumped the gun and let Anwyn know about him going before Gideon had figured out how best to tell her. If she was upset, Daegan was as much to blame as Gideon.
However, Gideon was getting a distinct vibe that Daegan was pissed at him for other reasons. The intent way the male was staring at him, in that manner that Gideon found damn hard to meet. It lifted his own hackles, making him itch to toss the other knife, test the vampire"s reflexes.
With irritating perception, the vampire jerked his head toward the corridor where Anwyn had disappeared. “I"ve been working with her on her hand-to-hand, as you have. But earlier, before you came in, she said she"d like to see us fight each other, to observe the moves by those who know how to do them. I expect now would be as good a time as any to do that.
Unless you prefer brooding over facing me on a mat.”
Gideon bit back a snarl. “She"s not being reasonable.”
“Women have a tendency to look at things somewhat differently than we do. If you do get yourself killed, she will blame herself. I"ll be left to deal with her anger and grief. But I suppose that matters little to you as well.”
Gideon snorted, something ugly and bitter twisting the words out of him. “Save the martyred routine. It"d clear the playing field pretty good, wouldn"t it?” In that second, Gideon thought the vampire might start their sparring match right there.
Daegan took a full, weighted second to reply, and when he did, his voice was flat. “We are not in competition, vampire hunter. Perhaps this is also as good a time as any to force you to face that.”
God, he hated it when Daegan pulled the cryptic shit. He did want to brood. He also wanted to pound something, and though Daegan was likely to obliterate him, he might get in a few jabs of his own. So he gave a cocky shrug. “Fine. I guess I can go kick your ass if it will teach her anything.”
“How magnanimous of you.”
She was still angry when they joined her, but she was already sorting through those emotions to grip the cool rationality she knew would help her handle them both. Daegan and Gideon lived by almost the same code. Risking their own lives was acceptable, no matter how uneven the odds. It was something they actually respected in each other. Just as they were united in their desire to protect her.
She"d had Daegan and Gideon each teach her ways to fight better, because it didn"t sit well with her to have them risk themselves on her behalf. Yes, they would always be more competent in that area than she was, because she wasn"t a warrior. What they didn"t seem to realize was she was as fiercely protective of the two of them as they were of her. If she was going to be part of a more violent world, she was going to learn to handle herself better. Maybe she"d shock the hell out of them and end up saving their asses one of these days.
She had her own arsenal of weapons, though, and knew the battleground where those weapons worked best. So by the time they arrived, she had—to all appearances—set aside their argument. She met Gideon"s wary look with one that her alley cats had perfected, that aloof, mysterious expression that was neither invitation nor rejection. Neither forgiveness nor outright anger. He was intelligent enough to become even more concerned, but Daegan was already directing them onto the sparring mats.
Daegan had donned a pair of black drawstring gi pants and a dark tank that showed off the architecture of chest, shoulders and muscled arms. Gideon wore a similar pair of pants, borrowed from Daegan, and was likewise barefoot. Though she"d expected them to immediately start sparring, instead Daegan spent time with her first, doing their usual lesson, showing her offensive and defensive moves. Only this time Gideon was there, sitting on the sidelines and giving additional suggestions for her height and weight. In Daegan"s absence, he"d also coached her, but this was the first time she"d had the pleasure of watching their different skills come together.
As they fell into what they knew so well, some of the tension she"d felt from Gideon eased.
Interestingly, she detected more of it from Daegan, vibrating toward Gideon. Though she didn"t have the same access to his mind she had to Gideon"s, she understood the cause.
Apparently Daegan felt far differently about Gideon risking himself for her protection than he did about Gideon wanting to get himself killed. Males.
At last, they squared off with each other, letting her take a seat on the sidelines to get her breath. As they went to work on each other, her volatile energy drifted in a sensual direction.
Lord, they were beautiful to watch. Daegan of course slowed his speed, and Gideon as well, so they could show her the maneuvers, stopping to verify she understood them. Once or twice they brought her into the middle to position her, demonstrate the proper way to turn, twist, flip, break, strong hands always making sure she was eased to the mat rather than flung there, despite her vampire resilience.
By the time they let her step out again, she was even more out of breath. Gideon"s shirt was damp with sweat, but he didn"t seem winded. “Can you show me some of those moves at a faster speed?” she asked. “I want to see what they look like in real time.” Daegan nodded, and he and Gideon faced each other again. Kicks, spins, dodges. Daegan moved swiftly enough, but she was impressed by how well Gideon choreographed with him. It was like watching two professional dancers, every move and countermove unconscious.
The flat of a palm slid along a leg, diverting its course. Two bodies came together, twisted like vines, smoothly breaking free, hands knowing just where to put pressure, grip, strike. A roll across the ground, a leg sweep, a quick grapple, an elbow into the side, and Gideon broke backward, taking them both down to the mat. Daegan was up and bringing down a leg to pin him, but Gideon caught the calf and twisted it, turning him away and then leaping back to his feet.
They didn"t engage in the banter she"d expected. She was drawing her experience from action movies, the quintessential male bonding scenes. The two males she was watching had always used these skills to survive or kill. It was never a game for them.
Though she was mesmerized by the display of male virility, they disrupted her absorption on occasion by pointing out technique, giving her new information on the grips, other ways to break them, and the importance of balance.
“A vampire"s balance is far better than a human"s,” Gideon said. “But if you catch him off guard, he"s going to have a similar reaction. So if he has you in a chest lock”—he glanced at Daegan, and the vampire obliged, sliding his arm across Gideon"s chest to grip him beneath the arm—“and you abruptly fall back against him, you can either break the hold or, if you"re going for more debilitating, hook the ankle.”
He demonstrated it, Daegan allowing the maneuver as Gideon flipped over him to pin his chest with a knee. There was a brief moment where he held him there, and Anwyn saw the men"s eyes meet, the challenge in Gideon"s, but then that moment was gone. Gideon shifted into a squat next to the man. He offered Daegan a hand up, the casual gesture at odds with tense shoulders. Daegan clasped his arm, but as he lifted his upper body, he startled both of them by curling a hand behind the vampire hunter"s neck and yanking him down to his mouth.
Gideon stiffened, but he didn"t pull away. Instead an involuntary noise came from his throat, as if he was fighting himself, the desire to stay greater than the desire to break away. Daegan changed the angle, delving deeper, coming up on his knees. Before Gideon could choose to withdraw, he"d shoved him so he landed on his back. In a heartbeat, Daegan was stretched out on him, one thigh pressed against Gideon"s groin, his other arm bracing him just above Gideon. Though Daegan"s broad shoulders shadowed the other man, Gideon"s hand dug into his arm in a near-combative grip. For a second he didn"t move, as if he"d been paralyzed.