“Uh, no.”
“Naked photos of his last five hundred girlfriends?”
“Sasha, seriously?”
“Hey, it happens. He’s got the body for it. If it’s not other women, then what could be so bad? I hope you’re not freaking out because the dude has a porn stash or something. Every guy has one whether he admits it or not. It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Does every guy have a closet full of whips, vibrators, and scary-looking metal torture things?” Kay whispered.
“Whoa? Are you serious? Girl, you have all the luck. It’s always those quiet, intense types that turn out to be undercover freaks.”
“Sasha! This is not helping. I have no idea what to do.”
“Baby girl, you don’t need to do anything except enjoy. A man who actually knows enough about sex toys to use them properly is a rare thing. My ex acted like my vibrator was an insult to his masculinity or something.”
Kay flopped on her back and stared at the ceiling miserably.
Sasha cleared her throat. “Okay, look. I know this is scary and new to you. You haven’t been with many guys. But do you really think Eli would hurt you?”
“I didn’t say that. But what if he wants to hit me with one of those things?”
“Uh-uh. Just answer the question. Has he ever done anything to you against your will or ever tried to push you into something that made you uncomfortable?”
Kay fidgeted. “No, of course not. He was trying to talk me out of liking him.”
“That’s because that man cares about you. I’m a little jealous to be honest. The way he looks at you… I get a proximity hot flash every time I see it.”
“What do I do, Sasha? I need you to tell me what I should do.”
“I can’t do that. All I can say is that good men are rare. I certainly haven’t met any lately. Even if it’s kind of scary that he’s into some freaky stuff, which I need to point out is not a bad thing, he’s a good guy who cares about you. Don’t you think he should at least be given the opportunity to explain what you saw?”
Kay thought back to him standing next to his closet, jeans low on his hips. He was perfect naked. Like a marble statue come to life. It was already intimidating to take her clothes off in front of him, but now she had to worry about all the other stuff he might want to do. Stuff she wasn’t sure she could handle.
How could she ever compete with someone like Carly? She wasn’t even sure what half that stuff was used for and was more than a little freaked out by the items she had recognized.
“You’re right. I’m going to try to talk to him about it. Although the thought is already embarrassing. Maybe I’ll cook up some chili and then if the conversation is too embarrassing, I can claim I have heartburn and leave the table.”
“Chili?”
“Yeah, it’s supposed to snow later today. So I figured I’d make chili or maybe some kind of stew.”
“Hmm, girl that is not sex food. That’s a little gassy, isn’t it?”
Kay giggled. “That’s why I love you. Always practical.”
“I know. I miss you, Kay. We’ve never gone this long without seeing each other.”
“I miss you, too. But I’m coming back home tomorrow morning. Eli just told me. So meet me at my parents’ house for lunch. I can’t wait to see you and catch up. I feel like I’ve been hidden away in a cave for the past few weeks.”
“Yes, but you’re in the cave with a sexy guy. So get off the phone with me and go talk to him. The sooner you talk, the sooner you two can make up and then he can show you some of his freaky stuff. And if you don’t want him, send him my way.”
“Sasha!”
“Just kidding. Or not. Bye!”
Kay hung up, still chuckling. She glanced at the time. Maybe if she started now she could come up with something suitably sexy for a romantic dinner. Sasha was right. They needed to talk, and she was ready to hear what he had to say with an open mind.
KAY DIDN’T HAVE long to obsess over things. A few minutes later Hope woke up, so she spent the rest of the morning entertaining the baby. When Eli emerged from his room around lunchtime, she was too embarrassed to look at him or even try to engage him in conversation. He’d looked at her cautiously and then gone into the dining room with his laptop. She could hear him clicking away, typing on the keyboard.
She chewed on her thumbnail and then scowled at the ragged edge. That was a habit she’d broken back in high school. But she was completely nervous, and there was no point pretending otherwise. Despite Sasha’s early-morning pep talk, she still hadn’t come up with a way to approach Eli about what she’d seen. Sasha seemed to think she should play it cool and act like a closet full of sex toys wasn’t at all intimidating.
Although it probably wasn’t to a lot of women. Women more sophisticated than her, obviously. She thought of Carly and scowled again.
She could talk about this rationally. It might be slightly awkward and embarrassing, but she could do it.
“Mama. Want more?” Hope waved her sippy cup in front of Kaylee. She grabbed her and planted kisses all over her face.
“Mommy’s not much fun today, is she? I’m sorry,” she whispered. She’d been so preoccupied thinking about Eli that she’d just been sitting in the play area in a daze. Resolved not to think about it anymore until that evening, she got up to refill Hope’s cup with juice.