“Uhm, what’s a dirty lap dance?” I frowned, my heart racing. Everything seemed simple enough except for the dirty lap dance. What exactly were these guys hoping was going to happen, and why?
“A lap dance in a short skirt and a bikini top.”
“Are you joking?” I glared at him. “Bikini top?”
“Pretend you’re acting in Showgirls with Elizabeth Berkeley.” He paused from eating and I watched as his eyes glazed over. “Maybe you should even watch that movie for some tips.” He swallowed hard as he daydreamed. “Watch how she swings her hips when she’s in the casino. And then when she bends back and she rubs her titties in his face and he’s motor-boating. Hmm.”
“Bob!” I shouted, feeling sick to my stomach. “Are you out of your mind?”
“Oops, I got carried away.” He looked at me guiltily. “Sorry.”
“Uh huh,” I muttered, feeling like I needed a shower.
“Just watch some movies, learn the moves and show up on Monday and do your job,” he said and then opened a file. “We have some birthday parties coming up this weekend. Do you think you’ll be able to dress up as an elephant on Saturday?”
“An elephant?” I shook my head. “No.”
“I guess I can ask Jessica.” He made a face. “Okay, you can go now.”
“When am I going to get the rest of the money?” I asked him, pausing before I left the office.
“They’ll pay you at work,” he said with a face and I knew he was telling the truth then because of how upset he looked. I knew he was upset because that meant he wasn’t getting his grubby hands on more of my money.
“So I just show up to the office on Monday and say I’m reporting for work as Scott Taylor’s new assistant?”
“Yup. I’ll email you the address.”
“And he won’t find this suspicious?”
“Nope.” He shook his head. “Oh yeah, wear a sexy suit to work on Monday.”
“What?”
“Remember, your job is to seduce him so he lets you give him the lap dance on Saturday at the party.”
“I don’t really understand how this is going to be funny.” I sighed. I knew that Bob didn’t care what I thought, but I seriously didn’t know what sort of joke this was meant to be. This wasn’t something that I’d done before working for Bob and his Candy Grams business. It seemed to me that Bob was taking on more and more clients that weren’t just simple birthday surprises. I was starting to worry that I was letting Bob lead me down a slippery slope. What was he going to ask me to do next? Slip out of a cake naked and offer me five hundred dollars?
“It’s not our business.” Bob shrugged. “We just take the money.”
“Is that really the way we want to lead our lives?” I asked him softly. “Doing whatever we have to, to make money? Do we want to sell our souls for a few bucks?”
“I don’t know about you,” Bob said as he munched on some more fries, “but I think I’d be happy to get paid to flirt with a hot guy if I was you. You seem like you don’t get much action by yourself.”
“Goodbye, Bob,” I said angrily and turned to leave his office for good before I went off on him, but then turned back to him with an afterthought. “By the way, I want a copy of that contract I just signed.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll email it to you.” Bob rolled his eyes and I left the office wondering what I was getting myself into. I quickly grabbed my phone to call Lacey to help me calm down.
***
“Thank you for calling Wet ‘n’ Wild, where the women are wet and the men are wild,” Lacey answered the phone in a sing-songy voice and I groaned.
“Not now, Lacey.”
“Uh oh, what’s wrong?”
“My boss is a jerk and I think he’s going to try and sell me into prostitution or something.”
“Sell you into prostitution?”
“Or the slave trade or whatever,” I said grumpily. “I think I’m making a mistake.”
“You mean the stripper job?”
“It’s not a stripper job,” I whined. “I’m going to be his assistant for a week, and then I’m going to give him a quick lap dance at an office meeting and then his friends are going to burst in and say ‘surprise’ or something like that.”
“What’s so wrong with that?” Lacey asked innocently. “It’s just a job.”
“I know it’s just a job, but he looks hot and, well, what if something happens?”
“What do you mean?” Lacey said in a light tone. “What could happen?”
“What if he gets hard during the lap dance or something? Or, you know.”
“No, what?” she asked excitedly.
“What if I like it?” I groaned, thinking of the photo. “He did look very attractive.”
“Girl, you sound like a desperado.” Lacey laughed. “Go on a date with one of those guys from online and concentrate on them instead of this guy that you don’t even know.”
“I don’t want to meet any of those guys.” I sighed as I got into my car. “They just don’t seem like my type.”
“You never know until you meet them,” Lacey said matter-of-factly. “And what about that one guy, Mike? He looked like he was a hottie. You need to get out there, Elizabeth. You can spend the rest of your life thinking about you know who.”