Flame took his blade from his belt and ran his finger down the edge. This was his tell that he was anxious. Ky, not receiving an answer, turned to Styx. “Church, Prez?”
Styx nodded, then walked to Mae and crushed his lips to hers. Mae melted in his arms. Ky then did the same to Lilah, and without conscious thought, my gaze drifted to Flame. As always, he was watching me, but this time, his nostrils were flaring, and his blade was running along his wrist. Panic flared within me. Something was troubling him in his head.
“Flame, let’s go. Got a shit ton of brothers that’ll be fucking relieved you haven’t checked out on us for good.” Ky’s voice snapped me back to the moment and I cleared my throat.
Flame glanced to Ky, then to me. I forced a smile to hide my trembling legs. Those kisses… Flame’s intense stare...
“Maddie?” Flame rasped, and I noticed all around us had gone silent.
Hating the attention, I stepped closer to him. “Return for me after your meeting and we shall go to your cabin. You still need to rest.”
Flame nodded once, and joined Styx and Ky who were already walking away in the distance. But he looked back. He looked back eleven times. Eleven. I counted.
“Maddie?” Mae’s voice made me look her way. Her face wore an expression of worry and she said, “Go back to Flame’s cabin? You are to stay with him further?”
“Yes,” I said feeling embarrassed by too much focus on me.
The sound of a gentle cough sounded, and I heard Beauty say, “Well, I gotta get to the shop and open up. Busy day ahead.” I kept my gaze down as she said her goodbyes to Lilah and Mae.
“Sarai, darlin’. I’ll bring you by the shop soon, okay? Get you out in the world more.”
“Thank you,” I heard Sarai say in return.
Moments later, I looked up and Mae and Lilah were stood together watching me. Heat surged through me and I asked, “What? Why do you stare at me?”
Lilah’s eyes widened at my sharp retort. “We worry for you, Maddie. Because we love you.”
Some of the venom left my body and I said, “You do not need to worry. I am fine.” Neither said anything to me, but I continued. “Yes, I am to return with Flame. He needs me.”
The tension from my sisters’ clear disapproval thickened around us. I kept my attention to the ground. I would not be moved on this. They did not know Flame as I did.
Lilah eventually moved to sit down and I saw Mae do the same. “Maddie, join us?” Lilah asked. Spotting the free chair between Mae and Lilah, I took a seat.
“Maddie, we are to accompany Sarai to church this afternoon. Would you like to join us?”
I lifted my head and glanced across to Sarai. Her young face wore a hopeful expression as she looked to me. “Mae and Lilah have told me of your church. That it is pure and does not share the same beliefs as The Order on women and our duties. I should very much like to see such a place. Right now I cannot comprehend it to be real.”
My stomach tightened seeing such disbelief on her face and, sitting forward, I said, “I would love to come with you. Pastor James is a lovely woman. She will show you what we have found of faith outside of the commune.”
Sarai’s blinding smile could have lit a dark room. “Thank you,” she said with tears in her eyes. She then got to her feet, drawing all attention. “I shall go and rest if we are to leave this afternoon.”
“Okay,” I replied and watched as Sarai walked off into the cabin.
Seconds passed as Sarai left us alone, then I suddenly blurted, “What does it feel like?”
I kept my focus on my busy hands in my lap, feeling my face heat with embarrassment, when Mae asked, “What, sister?”
Lifting my hand to my lips, I ran the fingertip along the plump flesh. Flickering my eyes to Mae, I asked, “To join lips. To kiss.”
Mae’s eyes flared widely then darted to Lilah. I heard Lilah getting up from her seat and she moved to sit down on the warm grass at my feet. Her hand pressed to my knee and her blue eyes were filled with questions.
“It is like nothing else,” Mae said, prompting me to watch her face. A secret smile had ghosted upon her lips and her breathing quickened. “It is one of my most favorite things to do in life.”
“And you, Lilah?” I asked shyly.
“Everything,” she admitted with a subtle rasp in her voice. “Because I never dreamed that I would ever have a man that loves me for me. But Ky does. He loves me more than I think I deserve.” Lilah’s hand lifted to run down her scar. “Even when I hurt myself, when I cut my hair, he still wanted me. And when he kisses me, it is my confirmation that I won his heart. That he is mine. For life.”