The four of us paused and darted our glances to each other before bursting out in giggles.
It felt good to laugh. It felt good to embrace life.
Two days had passed since Austin had brought me back to him, and I felt a little stronger. I’d restarted my sessions with Dr. Lund, and hopefully, I could get things back on track slowly but surely.
I’d been praying nightly, begging for the strength to see it through.
I don’t want to die, I would plead. I want Austin’s dream for us to come true.
“We’ve missed you so much, Lex,” Molly said, and she sniffed back her wrought emotions.
“Promise us you’ll speak to us if you feel down again. And I want that promise in blood if at all possible.” I looked over to Cass and tried to promise her by crossing my weak fingers. The four of us sat in silence for a moment, enjoying our closeness.
A knock on the door sounded, and Rome entered, his face desolate and his attention on me. “It’s time.”
My good feeling soon faded, and I instantly tried to sit up, but I immediately fell back down.
“Whoa, girl! What you doing?” Cass said in panic, and my friends all jumped up, trying to usher me back down to the bed.
I held out my hand. “No! Austin needs me. I can’t let him go through this alone.”
Molly looked to Rome, who nodded his head. “Give me a minute.” With that, he exited the door, only to return minutes later with a wheelchair and a nurse, who immediately began unhooking me from the IV machine and attaching the bag to the back of the wheelchair.
Moving toward me, Rome asked, “Am I okay to lift you into the chair?”
Fighting the usual panic at someone touching me, especially my back, I quickly nodded, and as Rome lifted me in his arms and placed me in the chair, I held my breath and closed my eyes.
This was for Austin.
For Levi…
For Chiara.
I just had to get to Austin.“You sure you’re strong enough for this, darlin’?” Ally asked, and I nodded as Cass began to push me down the hallway to Austin’s momma’s room. Pausing outside the door, I nodded to Rome to open it.
Cass rolled me in, and I immediately saw Levi and Austin on either side of the bed, both distraught and each clutching their mamma’s limp hands as the doctor stood at the head of the bed.
Austin’s eyes shot to mine and his face contorted in pain. He slid off the bed and raced to me, kneeling on the floor, placing his head in my lap. Tiredly lifting my hand, I ran my fingers through his dark, messy hair.
“I don’t think I can do this, Pix,” he said through a thick throat.
Fighting back my own tears, I said, “Yes, you can, baby. You need to be strong.” As I looked up, I saw Levi at the side of his mamma’s narrow bed, looking completely lost as he sat there alone.
Holding out my hand, I smiled at Levi, who swallowed in response. “Come here, sweetie,” I said.
Levi took a hesitant step before stopping and asking, “Are… are you okay now, Lex? Are you still starving yourself? You look so thin…”
Resisting a laugh at his blunt words, I whispered, “I will be, sweetie. I will be…”
Levi then gripped onto my hand as though I were his source of strength, his fingers shaking against mine.
Austin lifted his head when the doctor cleared his throat. “Austin, Levi, your mamma’s heart rate is slowing now. It’s time to say good-bye.”
Austin looked up at me, and I let go of Levi’s hand. Austin stood and, taking Levi by the hand, led him to the bed.
Austin’s free hand jutted out beside him, reaching for me, and Rome rolled me to him as the rest of our friends stood along the back wall, silent and respectful.
“Wait!” Austin said brokenly and fished into his pocket for his iPhone. Confused, I watched what he was doing. Pressing play on a song from his playlist, he placed the phone beside his mamma’s head.
“Ave Maria” began playing softly through the phone, and Austin looked sadly at his mamma’s serene face. “She never sleeps right without it playing. It always makes her smile… and you should always meet the sandman smiling.”
I fought hard to not break down at that gut-wrenching act.
“Lev, say good-bye to Mamma, kid,” Austin said gruffly, trying to be strong, and Levi inched closer to his mamma and laid a soft kiss on her cheek.
“Dio ti benedica, Mamma. Ti voglio bene.”
Levi moved back and Austin went next. Levi was crying now, and I pushed out my hand and took his, bringing him back to stand beside me.