Women in Love - Page 262/392

'I'll tell Thomas, shall I?' he said.

'I must go almost immediately after dinner,' she said.

It was a dark, cold evening. There was no fire in the drawing-room,

they sat in the library. He was mostly silent, absent, and Winifred

talked little. But when Gerald did rouse himself, he smiled and was

pleasant and ordinary with her. Then there came over him again the long

blanks, of which he was not aware.

She was very much attracted by him. He looked so preoccupied, and his

strange, blank silences, which she could not read, moved her and made

her wonder over him, made her feel reverential towards him.

But he was very kind. He gave her the best things at the table, he had

a bottle of slightly sweet, delicious golden wine brought out for

dinner, knowing she would prefer it to the burgundy. She felt herself

esteemed, needed almost.

As they took coffee in the library, there was a soft, very soft

knocking at the door. He started, and called 'Come in.' The timbre of

his voice, like something vibrating at high pitch, unnerved Gudrun. A

nurse in white entered, half hovering in the doorway like a shadow. She

was very good-looking, but strangely enough, shy and self-mistrusting.

'The doctor would like to speak to you, Mr Crich,' she said, in her

low, discreet voice.

'The doctor!' he said, starting up. 'Where is he?' 'He is in the dining-room.' 'Tell him I'm coming.' He drank up his coffee, and followed the nurse, who had dissolved like

a shadow.

'Which nurse was that?' asked Gudrun.

'Miss Inglis--I like her best,' replied Winifred.

After a while Gerald came back, looking absorbed by his own thoughts,

and having some of that tension and abstraction which is seen in a

slightly drunken man. He did not say what the doctor had wanted him

for, but stood before the fire, with his hands behind his back, and his

face open and as if rapt. Not that he was really thinking--he was only

arrested in pure suspense inside himself, and thoughts wafted through

his mind without order.

'I must go now and see Mama,' said Winifred, 'and see Dadda before he

goes to sleep.' She bade them both good-night.

Gudrun also rose to take her leave.

'You needn't go yet, need you?' said Gerald, glancing quickly at the

clock.' It is early yet. I'll walk down with you when you go. Sit down,

don't hurry away.' Gudrun sat down, as if, absent as he was, his will had power over her.

She felt almost mesmerised. He was strange to her, something unknown.

What was he thinking, what was he feeling, as he stood there so rapt,

saying nothing? He kept her--she could feel that. He would not let her

go. She watched him in humble submissiveness.