Ethelyn's Mistake - Page 180/218

"Did they talk of me?" Ethie asked, repenting the next minute that she

had been at all curious in the matter.

Mrs. Van Buren, bent upon annoying her, replied, "Some, yes; and knowing

the governor as they did, it is natural they should blame you more than

him. There was a rumor of his getting a divorce, but my friends did not

believe it and neither do I, though divorces are easy to get out West.

Have you written to him? Are you not 'most afraid he will think you came

back because he has been governor?"

"Aunt Sophia!" and Ethie looked very much like her former self, as she

started from her pillow and confronted her interlocutor. "He cannot

think so. I never knew he had been governor until I heard it from Aunt

Barbara last night. I came back for no honors, no object. My work was

taken from me; I had nothing more to do, and I was so tired, and sick,

and weary, and longed so much for home. Don't begrudge it to me, Aunt

Sophia, that I came to see Aunt Barbara once more. I won't stay long in

anybody's way; and if--if he likes, Richard--can--get--that--divorce--as

soon as he pleases."

The last came gaspingly, and showed the real state of Ethie's feelings.

In all the five long years of her absence the possibility that Richard

would seek to separate himself from her had never crossed her mind. She

had looked upon his love for her as something too strong to be

shaken--as the great rock in whose shadow she could rest whenever she

so desired. At first, when the tide of angry passion was raging at her

heart, she had said she never should desire it, that her strength was

sufficient to stand alone against the world; but as the weary weeks and

months crept on, and her anger had had time to cool, and she had learned

better to know the meaning of "standing alone in the world," and

thoughts of Richard's many acts of love and kindness kept recurring to

her mind, she had come gradually to see that the one object in the

future to which she was looking forward was a return to Aunt Barbara and

a possible reconciliation with her husband. The first she had achieved,

and the second seemed so close within her grasp, a thing so easy of

success, that in her secret heart she had exulted that, after all, she

was not to be more sorely punished than she had been--that she could not

have been so very much in fault, or Providence would have placed greater

obstacles in the way of restoration to all that now seemed desirable.

But Ethie's path back to peace and quiet was not to be free from thorns,

and for a few minutes she writhed in pain, as she thought how possible,

and even probable, it was that Richard should seek to be free from one

who had troubled him so much. Life looked very dreary to Ethelyn that

moment--drearier than it ever had before--but she was far too proud to

betray her real feelings to her aunt, who, touched by the look of

anguish on her niece's face, began to change her tactics, and say how

glad she was to have her darling back under any circumstances, and so

she presumed Richard would be. She knew he would, in fact; and if she

were Ethie, she should write to him at once, apprising him of her

return, but not making too many concessions.--Men could not bear them,

and it was better always to hold a stiff rein, or there was danger of a

collision. She might as well have talked to the winds, for all that

Ethie heard or cared. She was thinking of Richard, and the possibility

that she might not be welcome to him now. If so, nothing could tempt her

to intrude herself upon him. At all events, she would not make the first

advances. She would let Richard find out that she was there through some

other source than Aunt Barbara, who should not now write the letter. It

would look too much like begging him to take her back. This was Ethie's

decision, from which she could not be moved; and when, next day, Mrs.

Van Buren went back to Boston with the check for $1,000 which Aunt

Barbara had given her, she was pledged not to communicate with Richard

Markham in any way, while Aunt Barbara was held to the same promise.