Athalie - Page 139/222

"And when you came here to-night, and I saw in your face how these

four years had altered you--how it had been with you--I wanted you

back--to let you know I am sorry--to let you know I care for the man

who has known unhappiness, as I cared for the boy who had known only

happiness.

"Do you understand, Clive? Do you, dear? Don't you see what I see?--a

man standing all alone by a closed door behind which his hopes lie

dead.

"Clive, that is where you came to me, offering sympathy and

friendship. That is where I come to you in my turn, offering whatever

you care to take of me--if there is in me anything that may comfort

you."

He bent and laid his lips to her hands again, remaining so, curbed

before her; and she looked down at his lean and powerful head and

shoulders, and saw the hint of grey edging the crisp, dark hair, and

the dark stain of tropic suns, that never could be effaced.

So far no passion, other than innocent, had she ever known for any

man,--nothing of lesser emotion, nothing physical. And, had she

thought of it at all she must have believed that it was that way with

her still. For no thought concerning it disturbed her tender,

tremulous happiness with this man beside her who still held her hands

imprisoned against his breast.

And presently they were seated on the couch at the foot of her bed,

excited, garrulous, exchanging gossip, confidences, ideas long

unuttered, desires long unexpressed.

Under the sweeping flashlight of her intelligence the four years of

his absence were illuminated, and passed swiftly in review for his

inspection. Of loneliness, perplexity, grief, deprivation, she made

light, laughingly, shrugging her smooth young shoulders.

"All that was yesterday," she said. "There is only to-day, now--until

to-morrow becomes to-day. You won't go away, will you, Clive?"

"No."

"There is no need of your going, is there?--no reason for you to

go--no duty--moral obligation--is there, Clive?"

"None."

"You wouldn't say so just because I wish you to, would you?"

"I wouldn't be here at all if there were any reason for me to

be--there."

"Then I am not robbing her of you?--I am not depriving her of the

tiniest atom of anything that you owe to her? Am I, Clive?"

"I can't see how. There is only one thing I can do for--my wife. And

that is to keep away from her."