I blink back the angry, hurt tears blurring my vision and focus on climbing and reaching the safety of my tree.
I climb until the trunk starts to slim down too much to support me, a sign I'm as far up as I can go.
Hugging the tree, I find a somewhat comfortable perch to hold me and rest my forehead against the bark.
"Please let me go home, LF. This isn't cool."
Nothing happens.
"If this is because I made fun of your typos, I'm sorry."
I steady my breathing and wipe my face. A glance at the battle below is enough to tell me it's almost over. A ring of Black Moon Draw men five deep are around the tree, looking up in what I'm guessing is confusion. I huddle next to the trunk, not caring that the ants living in the bark are crawling all over my arms.
I'm emotionally exhausted. After meeting Disney Princess, I feel a little rawer, reminded once again why I never stacked up to what Jason thought I should be. She is perfect in every way. Me?
Not so much. Even in fiction, I can't get a reprieve. If I were average in real life, I'm below average here.
While I'm safe up here, I'm also reminded of all the other times I climbed a tree to escape my feelings and hurt. It's so fitting that I'm in a tree after Jason dumped me and I was dropped into a magical world. It's also so telling, I'm embarrassed.
My life really hasn't changed much. I hid as a kid. I hide as an adult, afraid of rejection and putting myself out there for fear of being hurt.
Maybe that's what being an adult is: quiet misery. Maybe I should stay in my tree forever, or at least until LF lets me return to my disappointing life.
"Witch!" The Shadow Knight bellows from the base of the tree. "Come down!"
"No!" I shout back. "I'm staying here!"
"You are a battle-witch, not a tree-witch!"
Does he really think I know what a tree-witch is, let alone think I am one? "I'm not a witch at all!"
"You did not learn your lesson." He sounds disgruntled.
"The one where you cut off my hand? Who does that?" I look at my newly grown hand, a little weirded out by it.
"You need another lesson."
"I don't - what're you doing?"
He pushes the trunk of the tree, testing it, and then strips off his weapons, depositing them into a heap beside him. His massive boar's head looks up at me for a split second before he does something I don't expect.