Beulah - Page 119/348

"I cannot! I cannot!" cried Beulah firmly, though tears gushed over

her cheeks.

"Cannot? cannot?" repeated the doctor, pressing heavily upon her

shoulders.

"Will not, then!" said she proudly.

They looked at each other steadily. A withering smile of scorn and

bitterness distorted his Apollo-like features, and he pushed her

from him, saying, in the deep, concentrated tone of intense

disappointment: "I might have known it. I might have expected it; for Fate has

always decreed me just such returns."

Leaning against the sculptured Niobe, which stood near, Beulah

exclaimed, in a voice of great anguish: "Oh, Dr. Hartwell! do not make me repent the day I entered this

house. God knows I am grateful, very grateful, for your unparalleled

kindness. Oh, that it were in my power to prove to you my gratitude!

Do not upbraid me. You knew that I came here only to be educated.

Even then I could not bear the thought of always imposing on your

generosity; and every day that passed strengthened this impatience

of dependence. Through your kindness it is now in my power to

maintain myself, and, after the opening of next session, I cannot

remain any longer the recipient of your bounty. Oh, sir, do not

charge me with ingratitude! It is more than I can bear; more than I

can bear!"

"Mark me, Beulah! Your pride will wreck you; wreck your happiness,

your peace of mind. Already its iron hand is crushing your young

heart. Beware lest, in yielding to its decrees, you become the

hopeless being a similar course has rendered me. Beware! But why

should I warn you? Have not my prophecies ever proved Cassandran?

Leave me."

"No, I will not leave you in anger." She drew near him and took his

hand in both hers. The fingers were cold and white as marble, rigid

and inflexible as steel.

"My guardian, would you have me take a step (through fear of your

displeasure) which would render my life a burden? Will you urge me

to remain, when I tell you that I cannot be happy here? I think

not."

"Urge you to remain? By the Furies--no! I urge you to go! Yes--go! I

no longer want you here. Your presence would irritate me beyond

measure. But listen to me. I am going to New York on business; had

intended taking you with me; but, since you are so stubbornly proud,

I can consent to leave you. I shall start to-morrow evening--rather

earlier than I expected--and shall not return before September,

perhaps even later. What your plans are I shall not inquire; but it

is my request that you remain in this house, under Mrs. Watson's

care, until your school duties commence; then you will, I suppose,

remove elsewhere. I also request, particularly, that you will not

hesitate to use the contents of a purse which I shall leave on my

desk for you. Remember that in coming years, when trials assail you,

if you need a friend, I will still assist you. You will leave me

now, if you please, as I have some letters to write." He motioned

her away, and, unable to frame any reply, she left the room.