Beulah - Page 158/348

"Beulah, you know he loves you!" cried Clara, with a strangely quiet

smile.

"Clara Sanders, never say that again as long as you live; for there

is not the shadow of truth in it."

"Ah, I would not believe it till it was forced upon me. The heart

bars itself a long time to painful truths! I have looked at you, and

wondered whether you could be ignorant of what I saw so clearly. I

believe you are honest in what you say. I know that you are; but it

is nevertheless true. I saw it the evening I went to ride. He loves

you, whether you see it or not. And, moreover, the world has begun

to join your names. I have heard, more than once, that he educated

you with the intention of marrying you; and recently it has been

rumored that the marriage would take place very soon. Do not be hurt

with me, Beulah! I think it is right that you should know all this."

"It is utterly false from beginning to end! He never had such a

thought! never! never!" cried Beulah, striking her clenched hand

heavily on the table.

"Why, then, was he so anxious to prevent your teaching?"

"Because he is generous and kind, and fancied it was a life of

hardship, which I could escape by accepting his offer to adopt me.

Your supposition is perfectly ridiculous. He is double my age. A

stern, taciturn man. What could possibly attract him to one whom he

looks upon as a mere child? And, moreover, he is a worshiper of

beauty! Now, it is an indisputable fact that I am anything but a

beauty! Oh, the idea is absurd beyond all degree. Never mention it

to me again. I tell you solemnly, Clara, your jealous fancy has run

away with your common sense."

A sad, incredulous smile flitted over Clara's face; but she made no

reply.

"Clara, rouse yourself from this weak dream. Oh, where is your

pride--your womanly pride--your self-respect? Is your life to be

aimless and dreary because of an unrequited attachment? Shake it

off! Rise above it! Destroy it! Oh, it makes the blood tingle in my

veins to think of your wasting your energies and hopes in love for

one who is so utterly indifferent to you. Much as I love you, Clara,

had I the power to make you his wife to-morrow, I would rather see

you borne to your grave. You know nothing of his fitful, moody

nature; his tyrannical will. You could not be happy with him; you

would see how utterly unsuited you are."