Beulah - Page 35/348

The room had grown dark, save where a mellow ray stole through the

western window. Beulah rose mechanically, lighted the lamp, and

shaded it so as to shield the eyes of the sleeping boy. The door was

open, and, glancing up, she saw Eugene on the threshold. Her arms

were thrown around him, with a low cry of mingled joy and grief.

"Oh, Eugene! please don't leave me! Whom have I in the world but

you?"

"Beulah, dear, I must go. Only think of the privilege of being at a

German university! I never dreamed of such a piece of good luck.

Don't cry so; I shall come back some of these days, such an erudite,

such an elegant young man, you will hardly know me. Only five years.

I am almost seventeen now; time passes very quickly, and you will

scarcely miss me before I shall be at home again."

He lifted up her face, and laughed gayly as he spoke.

"When are you to go?"

"The vessel sails Wednesday--three days from now. I shall be very

busy until then. Beulah, what glorious letters I shall write you

from the Old World! I am to see all Europe before I return; that is,

my father says I shall. He is coming on, in two or three years, with

Cornelia, and we are all to travel together. Won't it be glorious?"

"Yes, for you. But, Eugene, my heart seems to die when I think of

those coming five years. How shall I live without you? Oh, what

shall I do?"

"There, Beulah! do not look so wretched. You will have a thousand

things to divert your mind. My father says he will see that you are

sent to the public school. You know the tuition is free, and he

thinks he can find some good, kind family, where you will be taken

care of till your education is finished. Your studies will occupy

you closely, and you will have quite enough to think of, without

troubling yourself about my absence. Of course you will write to me

constantly, and each letter will be like having a nice, quiet chat

together. Oh. dear! can't you get up a smile, and look less forlorn?

You never would look on the bright side."

"Because I never had any to look on, except you and Lilly; and when

you are gone, everything will be dark--dark!" she groaned, and

covered her face with her hands.

"Not unless you determine to make it so. If I did not know that my

father would attend to your education, I should not be so delighted

to go. Certainly, Beulah, in improving yourself, you will have very

little leisure to sit down and repine that your lot is not among the

brightest. Do try to hope that things may change for the better. If

they do not, why, I shall not spend eternity in Europe; and when I

come home, of course I shall take care of you myself." She stood

with one hand resting on his arm, and while he talked on,

carelessly, of her future, she fixed her eyes on his countenance,

thinking of the desolate hours in store for her, when the mighty

Atlantic billows surged between her and the noble, classic face she

loved so devotedly. A shadowy panorama of coming years glided before

her, and trailing clouds seemed gathered about the path her little

feet must tread. A vague foreboding discovered to her the

cheerlessness, and she shivered in anticipating the dreariness that

awaited her. But there was time enough for the raging of the storm;

why rush so eagerly to meet it? She closed her eyes to shut out the

grim vision, and listened resolutely to the plans suggested for her

approval. When Eugene rose to say "good-night," it was touching to

note the efforts she made to appear hopeful; the sob swallowed, lest

it should displease him; the trembling lips forced into a smile, and

the heavy eyelids lifted bravely to meet his glance. When the door

closed after his retreating form, the hands were clasped

convulsively, and the white, tearless face, mutely revealed the

desolation which that loving heart locked in its darkened chambers.