Beulah - Page 63/348

She looked gravely up into the face beside her, and sought to read

its baffling characters. He had leaned his elbow on the melodeon,

and his wax-like fingers were thrust through his hair. His brow was

smooth, and his mouth at rest, but the dark eyes, with their

melancholy splendor, looked down at her moodily. They met her gaze

steadily; and then she saw into the misty depths, and a shudder

crept over her, as she fell on her knees, and said shiveringly: "Oh, sir, can it be?"

He put his hand on her head, and asked quietly: "Can what be, child?"

"Have you no God?"

His face grew whiter than was his wont. A scowl of bitterness

settled on it, and the eyes burned with an almost unearthly

brilliance, as he rose and walked away. For some time he stood

before the window, with his arms folded; and, laying her head on the

stool of the melodeon, Beulah knelt just as he left her It has been

said, "Who can refute a sneer?" Rather ask, Who can compute its

ruinous effects. To that kneeling figure came the thought, "If he,

surrounded by wealth and friends, and blessings, cannot believe in

God, what cause have I, poor, wretched, and lonely, to have faith in

him?" The bare suggestion of the doubt stamped it on her memory, yet

she shrank with horror from the idea, and an eager, voiceless prayer

ascended from her heart that she might be shielded from such

temptations in future. Dr. Hartwell touched her, and said, in his

usual low, musical tones: "It is time you were asleep. Do not indulge in any more horrible

dreams, if you please. Good-night, Beulah. Whenever you feel that

you would like to have some music, do not hesitate to ask me for

it."

He held open the door for her to pass out. She longed to ask him

what he lived for, if eternity had no joys for him; but, looking in

his pale face, she saw from the lips and eyes that he would not

suffer any questioning, and, awed by the expression of his

countenance, she said "Good-night," and hurried away. The merry hum

of childish voices again fell on her ear, and as she ascended the

steps a bevy of white-clad girls emerged from a room near, and

walked on just below her. Pauline's party was at its height. Beulah

looked down on the fairy gossamer robes, and gayly tripping girls,

and then hastened to her own room, while the thought presented

itself: "Why are things divided so unequally in this world? Why do some have

all of joy, and some only sorrow's brimming cup to drain?" But the

sweet voice of Faith answered, "What I do, thou knowest not now, but

thou shalt know hereafter," and, trusting the promise, she was

content to wait.