The Amateur Gentleman - Page 297/395

"No, I'm not happy," sighed Barnabas, "for oh! John Peterby, what

shall it profit a man though he gain the whole world, and lose his

soul!"

"Ah, sir--you mean--?"

"I mean--the Lady Cleone, John. Losing her, I lose all, and success

is worse than failure."

"But, sir,--must you lose her?"

"I fear so. Who am I that she should stoop to me among so many? Who

am I to expect so great happiness?"

"Sir," said Peterby, shaking his head, "I have never known you doubt

yourself or fortune till now!"

"It never occurred to me, John."

"And because of this unshaken confidence in yourself you won the

steeplechase, sir--unaided and alone you won for yourself a place in

the most exclusive circles in the World of Fashion--without friends

or influence you achieved the impossible, because you never doubted."

"Yes, I was very confident, John, but then, you see, I never thought

anything impossible--till now."

"And therefore you succeeded, sir. But had you constantly doubted

your powers and counted failure even as a possibility, you might

still have dreamed of your success--but never achieved it."

"Why then," sighed Barnabas, rising, "it seems that Failure has

marked me for her own at last, for never was man fuller of doubt

than I."