"About six months or a year, the lawyer said, I think."
To hear these two poor Arcadian innocents talk of imperial law would
have made a humane person weep who should have known what a dangerous
structure they were building up on their supposed knowledge. They
remained in thought, like children in the presence of the
incomprehensible.
"Giles," she said, at last, "it makes me quite weary when I think how
serious my situation is, or has been. Shall we not go out from here
now, as it may seem rather fast of me--our being so long together, I
mean--if anybody were to see us? I am almost sure," she added,
uncertainly, "that I ought not to let you hold my hand yet, knowing
that the documents--or whatever it may be--have not been signed; so
that I--am still as married as ever--or almost. My dear father has
forgotten himself. Not that I feel morally bound to any one else,
after what has taken place--no woman of spirit could--now, too, that
several months have passed. But I wish to keep the proprieties as well
as I can."
"Yes, yes. Still, your father reminds us that life is short. I myself
feel that it is; that is why I wished to understand you in this that we
have begun. At times, dear Grace, since receiving your father's
letter, I am as uneasy and fearful as a child at what he said. If one
of us were to die before the formal signing and sealing that is to
release you have been done--if we should drop out of the world and
never have made the most of this little, short, but real opportunity, I
should think to myself as I sunk down dying, 'Would to my God that I
had spoken out my whole heart--given her one poor little kiss when I
had the chance to give it! But I never did, although she had promised
to be mine some day; and now I never can.' That's what I should think."
She had begun by watching the words from his lips with a mournful
regard, as though their passage were visible; but as he went on she
dropped her glance. "Yes," she said, "I have thought that, too. And,
because I have thought it, I by no means meant, in speaking of the
proprieties, to be reserved and cold to you who loved me so long ago,
or to hurt your heart as I used to do at that thoughtless time. Oh,
not at all, indeed! But--ought I to allow you?--oh, it is too
quick--surely!" Her eyes filled with tears of bewildered, alarmed
emotion.