"Perhaps it was, Why should Gretchen not revoke the promise to which
she holds me?"
"You should know, Herr," said Gretchen, gently.
"But I do not. I only know that a man is human and that a beautiful
woman was made to be loved." Everything seemed solved now that
Gretchen stood at my side.
But she turned as if to go.
"Gretchen," I called, "do not go. Forgive me; if only you understood!'"
"Perhaps I do understand," she replied with a gentleness new to me.
"Do you remember why I asked you to stay?"
"Yes; I was to be your friend."
"This time it is for me to ask whether I go or stay."
"Stay, Gretchen!" But I was a hypocrite when I said it.
"I knew that you would say that," simply.
"Gretchen, sit down and I'll tell you the story of my life, as they say
on the stage." I knocked the dead ash from my pipe and stuffed the
bowl with fresh weed. I lit it and blew a cloud of smoke into the air.
"Do you see that, Gretchen?"
"Yes, Herr," sitting down, the space of a yard between us.
"It is pretty, very; but see how the wind carries it about! As it
leaves my throat it looks like a tangible substance. Reach for it and
it is gone. That cloud of smoke is my history."
"It disappears," said Gretchen.
"And so shall I at the appointed time. That cloud of smoke was a
fortune. I reached for it, and there was nothing but the air in my
hand. It was a woman's love. For five years I watched it curl and
waver. In it I saw many castles and the castles were fair, indeed. I
strove to grasp this love; smoke, smoke. Smoke is nothing, given a
color. Thus it is with our dreams. If only we might not wake!"
Gretchen's eyes were following the course of the languid river.
"Once there was a woman I thought I loved; but she would have none of
it. She said that the love I gave her was not complete because she did
not return it. She brought forth the subject of affinities, and
ventured to say that some day I might meet mine. I scoffed inwardly.
I have now found what she said to be true. The love I gave her was the
bud; the rose-- Gretchen," said I, rising, "I love you; I am not a
hypocrite; I cannot parade my regard for you under the flimsy guise of
friendship."