But the moral man had been wrecked before, or this could not have
been. It was only because of his guilt--of its exposure rather--that
he sunk. In striving to shake off the oppressive burden, he shook
off the intellect which had been compelled chiefly to endure it.
The sense of shame, the conviction of loss, and, possibly, other
causes of conscience which lay yet deeper--for the progeny of crime
is most frequently a litter as numerous as a whelp's puppies--helped
to crush the mind which was neither strong enough to resist temptation
at first, nor to bear exposure at last. I turned away with a tear,
which I could not suppress, from the wretched spectacle. But I could
have borne with more patience to behold this ruin, than to subdue
the rising reproach which I felt as I turned to encounter Mrs.
Clifford.
This weak woman, still weak, received me coldly, and I could see
in her looks that she regarded me as one whom it was natural to
suppose would feel some exultation at beholding their downfall.
I saw this, but determined to say nothing, in the attempt to undo
these impressions. I knew that time was the best teacher in all
such matters, and resolved that my deportment should gradually make
her wiser on the subject of that nature which she had so frequently
abused, and which, I well knew, she could never understand. But
this hope I soon discovered to be unavailing. Her disaster had
only soured, not subdued her; and, with the natural tendency of
the vulgar mind, she seemed to regard me as the person to whom she
should ascribe all her misfortunes. As, to her narrow intellect,
it seemed natural that I should exult in the accomplishment of my
predictions, so it was a process equally natural that she should
couple me with their occurrence; and, indeed, I was too nearly
connected with the event, through the medium of my unconscious
father, not to feel some portion of the affliction on his account
also; though neither his memory nor my reputation suffered from
the development of the affair in the community where we lived.
Mrs. Clifford did not openly, or in words, betray the feelings
which were striving in her soul; but the general restraint which
she put upon herself in my presence, the acerbity of her tone,
manner, and language, to poor Julia, and the unvaried querulousness
of her remarks, were sufficient to apprize me of the spite which
she would have willingly bestowed upon myself, had she any tolerable
occasion for doing so. A few weeks served still further to humble
the conceit and insolence of the unfortunate woman. The affair
turned out much more seriously than I expected. A sudden fall in
the value of real and personal estate, just about the time when
the sheriff's sale took place, rendered necessary a second levy,
which swept the miserable remnant of Mr. Clifford's fortune, leaving
nothing to my uncle but a small estate which had been secured by
settlement to Mrs. Clifford and her daughter, and which the sheriff
could not legally lay hands on.