Dangerous Days - Page 12/297

"Very much. It seemed a trifle low, but you know I always like your

clothes." He was almost pathetically anxious to make up to her for that

moment's disloyalty in the library.

"There!" she said, brushing the papers aside. "Now we're getting at

it. Was I anything like as low as Audrey Valentine? Of course not! Her

back--You just drive me to despair, Clay. Nothing I do pleases you. The

very tone of that secretary of yours to-day, when I told her about that

over-draft--it was positively insulting!"

"I don't like overdrafts," he said, without any irritation. "When you

want extra amounts you have only to let me know."

"You are always finding fault with me," she complained. "It's either

money, or my clothes, or Graham, or something." Her eyes filled. She

looked young and absurdly childish. But a talk he had had with the

rector was still in his mind. It was while they were still at the table,

and Nolan had been attacking the British government.

"We get out of this world largely what we put into it," he had said.

"You give largely, Clay, and you receive largely. I rejoice in your

prosperity, because you have earned it."

"You think, then," he had asked, "that we only receive as we give? I

don't mean material things, of course."

The rector had fixed him with kindly, rather faded old eyes. "That has

been my experience," he said. "Happiness for instance only comes when

we forget our eternal search for it, and try to make others happy. Even

religion is changing. The old selfish idea of saving our own souls has

given way largely to the saving of others, by giving them a chance to

redeem themselves. Decent living conditions--"

He had gone on, but Clayton had not listened very intently. He had been

wondering if happiness was not the thing he had somehow missed. It was

then that he had decided to give the car. If, after all, that would make

for the rector's happiness-"I don't want to find fault with you, Natalie," he said gravely. "I

would like to see you happy. Sometimes I think you are not. I have my

business, but you have nothing to do, and--I suppose you wouldn't be

interested in war-work, would you? There are a lot of committees, and

since I've been in England I realize what a vast amount is needed.

Clothes, you know, and bandages, and--well, everything."