Dangerous Days - Page 190/297

"I'm just hung around your neck like a stone," she lamented. "You don't

care a rap for me; I know it. You're just sorry for me."

Her eyes filled again, and Graham rose, with an impatient movement.

"Let's get out of this," he said roughly. "The whole place is staring at

you."

But on the road the fact that she had been weeping for him made him

relent. He put an arm around her and drew her to him.

"Don't cry, honey," he said. "It makes me unhappy to see you miserable."

He kissed her. And they clung together, finding a little comfort in the

contact of warm young bodies.

He went up to her room that night. He was more anxious as to Rudolph

than he cared to admit, but he went up, treading softly on stairs

that creaked with every step. He had no coherent thoughts. He wanted

companionship rather than love. He was hungry for what she gave him, the

touch of her hands about his neck, the sense of his manhood that shone

from her faithful eyes, the admiration and unstinting love she offered

him.

But alone in the little room he had a reaction, not the less keen

because it was his fastidious rather than his moral sense that revolted.

The room was untidy, close, sordid. Even Anna's youth did not redeem it.

Again he had the sense, when he had closed the door, of being caught in

a trap, and this time a dirty trap. When she had taken off her hat, and

held up her face to be kissed, he knew he would not stay.

"It's awful, isn't it?" she asked, following his eyes.

"It doesn't look like you. That's sure."

"I hurried out. It's not so bad when it's tidy."

He threw up the window, and stood there a moment. The spring air was

cool and clean, and there was a sound of tramping feet below. He looked

down. The railway station was near-by, and marching toward it, with the

long swing of regulars, a company of soldiers was moving rapidly. The

night, the absence of drums or music, the businesslike rapidity of

their progress, held him there, looking down. He turned around. Anna had

slipped off her coat, and had opened the collar of her blouse. Her neck

gleamed white and young. She smiled at him.

"I guess I'll be going," he stammered.

"Going!"

"I only wanted to see how you are fixed." His eyes evaded hers. "I'll

see you again in a day or two. I--"