Sanine - Page 177/233

On that same evening Sanine went to see Soloveitchik. The little Jew

was sitting alone on the steps of his house, gazing at the bare,

deserted space in front of it where several disused pathways crossed

the withered grass. Depressing indeed was the sight of the vacant

sheds, with their huge, rusty locks, and of the black windows of the

mill. The whole scene spoke mournfully of life and activity that long

had ceased.

Sanine instantly noticed the changed expression of Soloveitchik's face.

He no longer smiled, but seemed anxious and worried. His dark eyes had

a questioning look.

"Ah! good evening," he said, as in apathetic fashion he took the

other's hand. Then he continued gazing at the calm evening sky, against

which the black roofs of the sheds stood out in ever sharper relief.

Sanine sat down on the opposite side of the steps, lighted a cigarette,

and silently watched Soloveitchik, whose strange demeanour interested

him.

"What do you do with yourself here?" he asked, after a while.

Languidly the other turned to him his large, sad eyes.

"I just live here, that's all. When the mill was at work, I used to be

in the office. But now it's closed, and everybody's gone away except

myself."

"Don't you find it lonely, to be all by yourself, like this?"

Soloveitchik was silent.

Then, shrugging his shoulders, he said: "It's all the same to me."

They remained silent. There was no sound but the rattling of the dog's

chain.

"It's not the place that's lonely," exclaimed Soloveitchik with sudden

vehemence. "But it's here I feel it, and here," He touched his forehead

and his breast.

"What's the matter with you?" asked Sanine calmly.

"Look here," continued Soloveitchik, becoming more excited, "you struck

a man to-day, and smashed his face in. Perhaps you have ruined his

whole life. Pray don't be offended at my speaking to you like this. I

have thought a great deal about it all, sitting here, as you see, and

wondering, wondering. Now, if I ask you something, will you answer me?"

For a moment his features were contorted by his usual set smile.

"Ask me whatever you like," replied Sanine, kindly. "You're afraid of

offending me, eh? That won't offend me, I assure you. What's done is

done; and, if I thought that I had done wrong, I should be the first to

say so."

"I wanted to ask you this," said Soloveitchik, quivering with

excitement. "Do you realize that perhaps you might have killed that

man?"