Now, then, who had taken the pains to accuse me to my father? The General, Andrew Karlovitch? He did not trouble himself much about me; moreover, Ivan Mironoff had not thought it worth while to report my duel to him. My suspicions fell on Alexis. He only would find some advantage in this information, the consequence of which might be my dismissal from the fortress and separation from the Commandant's family. I went to tell every thing to Marie. She met me on the doorstep.
"What has happened to you? how pale you are!"
"All's over," I replied, handing her my father's letter.
It was her turn to blanch. Having read the letter she returned it, and said in a trembling voice: "It was not my destiny. Your parents do not wish me in their family; may the will of God be done! He knows better than we what is best for us. There is nothing to be done in the matter, Peter; you, at least, may be happy."
"It shall not be so," I exclaimed, taking her hand. "You love me, I am ready for any fate. Let us go and throw ourselves at your parents' feet. They are simple people; they are neither haughty nor cruel; they will give us their benediction; we will marry; and in time, I am sure, we will soften my father. My mother will intercede for us, and he will pardon me."
"No, Peter, I will not marry you without the benediction of your parents. You would not be happy without their blessing. Let us submit to the will of God. If you meet another bride, if you love her, may God be with you! I, Peter, I will pray for both of you." Tears interrupted her, and she went away; I wished to follow her into the house, but I was not master of myself, and I went to my own quarters. I was plunged in melancholy, when Saveliitch came to interrupt my reflections.
"There, my lord," said he, presenting me a sheet of paper all covered with writing, "see if I am a spy on my master, and if I try to embroil father and son."
I took the paper from his hand; it was his reply to my father's letter.
I could not help smiling at the old man's letter. I was in no condition to write to my father, and to calm my mother his letter seemed sufficient.
From that day, Marie scarcely spoke to me, and even tried to avoid me. The Commandant's house became insupportable, and I accustomed myself, little by little, to remain alone in my room. At first Basilia reasoned with me, but seeing my persistency she let me alone. I saw Ivan Mironoff only when the service required it. I had but rare interviews with Alexis, for whom my antipathy increased, because I thought I discovered in him a secret enmity which confirmed my suspicions. Life became a burden; I gave myself up to a melancholy which was fed by solitude and inaction. Love burned on in silence and tortured me, more and more. I lost all taste for reading and literature; I let myself become completely depressed; and I feared that I should either become a lunatic or rush into dissipation, when events occurred that had great influence on my life and give a strong and healthy tone to my mind.