Don Quixote - Part I - Page 66/400

"Nay, gossip," said the barber, "for this that I have here is the famous

'Don Belianis.'"

"Well," said the curate, "that and the second, third, and fourth parts

all stand in need of a little rhubarb to purge their excess of bile, and

they must be cleared of all that stuff about the Castle of Fame and other

greater affectations, to which end let them be allowed the over-seas

term, and, according as they mend, so shall mercy or justice be meted out

to them; and in the mean time, gossip, do you keep them in your house and

let no one read them."

"With all my heart," said the barber; and not caring to tire himself with

reading more books of chivalry, he told the housekeeper to take all the

big ones and throw them into the yard. It was not said to one dull or

deaf, but to one who enjoyed burning them more than weaving the broadest

and finest web that could be; and seizing about eight at a time, she

flung them out of the window.

In carrying so many together she let one fall at the feet of the barber,

who took it up, curious to know whose it was, and found it said, "History

of the Famous Knight, Tirante el Blanco."

"God bless me!" said the curate with a shout, "'Tirante el Blanco' here!

Hand it over, gossip, for in it I reckon I have found a treasury of

enjoyment and a mine of recreation. Here is Don Kyrieleison of Montalvan,

a valiant knight, and his brother Thomas of Montalvan, and the knight

Fonseca, with the battle the bold Tirante fought with the mastiff, and

the witticisms of the damsel Placerdemivida, and the loves and wiles of

the widow Reposada, and the empress in love with the squire Hipolito--in

truth, gossip, by right of its style it is the best book in the world.

Here knights eat and sleep, and die in their beds, and make their wills

before dying, and a great deal more of which there is nothing in all the

other books. Nevertheless, I say he who wrote it, for deliberately

composing such fooleries, deserves to be sent to the galleys for life.

Take it home with you and read it, and you will see that what I have said

is true."

"As you will," said the barber; "but what are we to do with these little

books that are left?"

"These must be, not chivalry, but poetry," said the curate; and opening

one he saw it was the "Diana" of Jorge de Montemayor, and, supposing all

the others to be of the same sort, "these," he said, "do not deserve to

be burned like the others, for they neither do nor can do the mischief

the books of chivalry have done, being books of entertainment that can

hurt no one."