Middlemarch - Page 107/561

"Poor fellow! I think he is in love with you."

"I am not aware of it. And to me it is one of the most odious things

in a girl's life, that there must always be some supposition of falling

in love coming between her and any man who is kind to her, and to whom

she is grateful. I should have thought that I, at least, might have

been safe from all that. I have no ground for the nonsensical vanity

of fancying everybody who comes near me is in love with me."

Mary did not mean to betray any feeling, but in spite of herself she

ended in a tremulous tone of vexation.

"Confound John Waule! I did not mean to make you angry. I didn't know

you had any reason for being grateful to me. I forgot what a great

service you think it if any one snuffs a candle for you." Fred also had

his pride, and was not going to show that he knew what had called forth

this outburst of Mary's.

"Oh, I am not angry, except with the ways of the world. I do like to

be spoken to as if I had common-sense. I really often feel as if I

could understand a little more than I ever hear even from young

gentlemen who have been to college." Mary had recovered, and she spoke

with a suppressed rippling under-current of laughter pleasant to hear.

"I don't care how merry you are at my expense this morning," said Fred,

"I thought you looked so sad when you came up-stairs. It is a shame you

should stay here to be bullied in that way."

"Oh, I have an easy life--by comparison. I have tried being a teacher,

and I am not fit for that: my mind is too fond of wandering on its own

way. I think any hardship is better than pretending to do what one is

paid for, and never really doing it. Everything here I can do as well

as any one else could; perhaps better than some--Rosy, for example.

Though she is just the sort of beautiful creature that is imprisoned

with ogres in fairy tales."

"_Rosy!_" cried Fred, in a tone of profound brotherly scepticism.

"Come, Fred!" said Mary, emphatically; "you have no right to be so

critical."

"Do you mean anything particular--just now?"

"No, I mean something general--always."

"Oh, that I am idle and extravagant. Well, I am not fit to be a poor

man. I should not have made a bad fellow if I had been rich."

"You would have done your duty in that state of life to which it has

not pleased God to call you," said Mary, laughing.