Middlemarch - Page 184/561

"The offender's sorrow brings but small relief

To him who wears the strong offence's cross."

--SHAKESPEARE: Sonnets.

I am sorry to say that only the third day after the propitious events

at Houndsley Fred Vincy had fallen into worse spirits than he had known

in his life before. Not that he had been disappointed as to the

possible market for his horse, but that before the bargain could be

concluded with Lord Medlicote's man, this Diamond, in which hope to the

amount of eighty pounds had been invested, had without the slightest

warning exhibited in the stable a most vicious energy in kicking, had

just missed killing the groom, and had ended in laming himself severely

by catching his leg in a rope that overhung the stable-board. There was

no more redress for this than for the discovery of bad temper after

marriage--which of course old companions were aware of before the

ceremony. For some reason or other, Fred had none of his usual

elasticity under this stroke of ill-fortune: he was simply aware that

he had only fifty pounds, that there was no chance of his getting any

more at present, and that the bill for a hundred and sixty would be

presented in five days. Even if he had applied to his father on the

plea that Mr. Garth should be saved from loss, Fred felt smartingly

that his father would angrily refuse to rescue Mr. Garth from the

consequence of what he would call encouraging extravagance and deceit.

He was so utterly downcast that he could frame no other project than to

go straight to Mr. Garth and tell him the sad truth, carrying with him

the fifty pounds, and getting that sum at least safely out of his own

hands. His father, being at the warehouse, did not yet know of the

accident: when he did, he would storm about the vicious brute being

brought into his stable; and before meeting that lesser annoyance Fred

wanted to get away with all his courage to face the greater. He took

his father's nag, for he had made up his mind that when he had told Mr.

Garth, he would ride to Stone Court and confess all to Mary. In fact,

it is probable that but for Mary's existence and Fred's love for her,

his conscience would have been much less active both in previously

urging the debt on his thought and impelling him not to spare himself

after his usual fashion by deferring an unpleasant task, but to act as

directly and simply as he could. Even much stronger mortals than Fred

Vincy hold half their rectitude in the mind of the being they love

best. "The theatre of all my actions is fallen," said an antique

personage when his chief friend was dead; and they are fortunate who

get a theatre where the audience demands their best. Certainly it

would have made a considerable difference to Fred at that time if Mary

Garth had had no decided notions as to what was admirable in character.