Middlemarch - Page 281/561

"I have often thought that I should like to talk to you again," she

said, immediately. "It seems strange to me how many things I said to

you."

"I remember them all," said Will, with the unspeakable content in his

soul of feeling that he was in the presence of a creature worthy to be

perfectly loved. I think his own feelings at that moment were perfect,

for we mortals have our divine moments, when love is satisfied in the

completeness of the beloved object.

"I have tried to learn a great deal since we were in Rome," said

Dorothea. "I can read Latin a little, and I am beginning to understand

just a little Greek. I can help Mr. Casaubon better now. I can find

out references for him and save his eyes in many ways. But it is very

difficult to be learned; it seems as if people were worn out on the way

to great thoughts, and can never enjoy them because they are too tired."

"If a man has a capacity for great thoughts, he is likely to overtake

them before he is decrepit," said Will, with irrepressible quickness.

But through certain sensibilities Dorothea was as quick as he, and

seeing her face change, he added, immediately, "But it is quite true

that the best minds have been sometimes overstrained in working out

their ideas."

"You correct me," said Dorothea. "I expressed myself ill. I should

have said that those who have great thoughts get too much worn in

working them out. I used to feel about that, even when I was a little

girl; and it always seemed to me that the use I should like to make of

my life would be to help some one who did great works, so that his

burthen might be lighter."

Dorothea was led on to this bit of autobiography without any sense of

making a revelation. But she had never before said anything to Will

which threw so strong a light on her marriage. He did not shrug his

shoulders; and for want of that muscular outlet he thought the more

irritably of beautiful lips kissing holy skulls and other emptinesses

ecclesiastically enshrined. Also he had to take care that his speech

should not betray that thought.

"But you may easily carry the help too far," he said, "and get

over-wrought yourself. Are you not too much shut up? You already look

paler. It would be better for Mr. Casaubon to have a secretary; he

could easily get a man who would do half his work for him. It would

save him more effectually, and you need only help him in lighter ways."