Middlemarch - Page 369/561

"Are you ill, Edward?" she said, rising immediately.

"I felt some uneasiness in a reclining posture. I will sit here for a

time." She threw wood on the fire, wrapped herself up, and said, "You

would like me to read to you?"

"You would oblige me greatly by doing so, Dorothea," said Mr. Casaubon,

with a shade more meekness than usual in his polite manner. "I am

wakeful: my mind is remarkably lucid."

"I fear that the excitement may be too great for you," said Dorothea,

remembering Lydgate's cautions.

"No, I am not conscious of undue excitement. Thought is easy."

Dorothea dared not insist, and she read for an hour or more on the same

plan as she had done in the evening, but getting over the pages with

more quickness. Mr. Casaubon's mind was more alert, and he seemed to

anticipate what was coming after a very slight verbal indication,

saying, "That will do--mark that"--or "Pass on to the next head--I omit

the second excursus on Crete." Dorothea was amazed to think of the

bird-like speed with which his mind was surveying the ground where it

had been creeping for years. At last he said--

"Close the book now, my dear. We will resume our work to-morrow. I

have deferred it too long, and would gladly see it completed. But you

observe that the principle on which my selection is made, is to give

adequate, and not disproportionate illustration to each of the theses

enumerated in my introduction, as at present sketched. You have

perceived that distinctly, Dorothea?"

"Yes," said Dorothea, rather tremulously. She felt sick at heart.

"And now I think that I can take some repose," said Mr. Casaubon. He

laid down again and begged her to put out the lights. When she had

lain down too, and there was a darkness only broken by a dull glow on

the hearth, he said--

"Before I sleep, I have a request to make, Dorothea."

"What is it?" said Dorothea, with dread in her mind.

"It is that you will let me know, deliberately, whether, in case of my

death, you will carry out my wishes: whether you will avoid doing what

I should deprecate, and apply yourself to do what I should desire."

Dorothea was not taken by surprise: many incidents had been leading her

to the conjecture of some intention on her husband's part which might

make a new yoke for her. She did not answer immediately.

"You refuse?" said Mr. Casaubon, with more edge in his tone.

"No, I do not yet refuse," said Dorothea, in a clear voice, the need of

freedom asserting itself within her; "but it is too solemn--I think it

is not right--to make a promise when I am ignorant what it will bind me

to. Whatever affection prompted I would do without promising."