Middlemarch - Page 93/561

Thus, in riding home, both the brother and the sister were preoccupied

and inclined to be silent. Rosamond, whose basis for her structure had

the usual airy slightness, was of remarkably detailed and realistic

imagination when the foundation had been once presupposed; and before

they had ridden a mile she was far on in the costume and introductions

of her wedded life, having determined on her house in Middlemarch, and

foreseen the visits she would pay to her husband's high-bred relatives

at a distance, whose finished manners she could appropriate as

thoroughly as she had done her school accomplishments, preparing

herself thus for vaguer elevations which might ultimately come. There

was nothing financial, still less sordid, in her previsions: she cared

about what were considered refinements, and not about the money that

was to pay for them.

Fred's mind, on the other hand, was busy with an anxiety which even his

ready hopefulness could not immediately quell. He saw no way of

eluding Featherstone's stupid demand without incurring consequences

which he liked less even than the task of fulfilling it. His father

was already out of humor with him, and would be still more so if he

were the occasion of any additional coolness between his own family and

the Bulstrodes. Then, he himself hated having to go and speak to his

uncle Bulstrode, and perhaps after drinking wine he had said many

foolish things about Featherstone's property, and these had been

magnified by report. Fred felt that he made a wretched figure as a

fellow who bragged about expectations from a queer old miser like

Featherstone, and went to beg for certificates at his bidding.

But--those expectations! He really had them, and he saw no agreeable

alternative if he gave them up; besides, he had lately made a debt

which galled him extremely, and old Featherstone had almost bargained

to pay it off. The whole affair was miserably small: his debts were

small, even his expectations were not anything so very magnificent.

Fred had known men to whom he would have been ashamed of confessing the

smallness of his scrapes. Such ruminations naturally produced a streak

of misanthropic bitterness. To be born the son of a Middlemarch

manufacturer, and inevitable heir to nothing in particular, while such

men as Mainwaring and Vyan--certainly life was a poor business, when a

spirited young fellow, with a good appetite for the best of everything,

had so poor an outlook.

It had not occurred to Fred that the introduction of Bulstrode's name

in the matter was a fiction of old Featherstone's; nor could this have

made any difference to his position. He saw plainly enough that the

old man wanted to exercise his power by tormenting him a little, and

also probably to get some satisfaction out of seeing him on unpleasant

terms with Bulstrode. Fred fancied that he saw to the bottom of his

uncle Featherstone's soul, though in reality half what he saw there was

no more than the reflex of his own inclinations. The difficult task of

knowing another soul is not for young gentlemen whose consciousness is

chiefly made up of their own wishes.