Wives and Daughters: An Every-Day Story - Page 174/572

The last afternoon of her stay at the Hall came. Roger had gone out

on the Squire's business. Molly went into the garden, thinking over

the last summer, when Mrs. Hamley's sofa used to be placed under

the old cedar-tree on the lawn, and when the warm air seemed to be

scented with roses and sweetbriar. Now, the trees leafless, there was

no sweet odour in the keen frosty air; and looking up at the house,

there were the white sheets of blinds, shutting out the pale winter

sky from the invalid's room. Then she thought of the day her father

had brought her the news of his second marriage: the thicket was

tangled with dead weeds and rime and hoar-frost; and the beautiful

fine articulations of branches and boughs and delicate twigs were

all intertwined in leafless distinctness against the sky. Could she

ever be so passionately unhappy again? Was it goodness, or was it

numbness, that made her feel as though life was too short to be

troubled much about anything? Death seemed the only reality. She had

neither energy nor heart to walk far or briskly; and turned back

towards the house. The afternoon sun was shining brightly on the

windows; and, stirred up to unusual activity by some unknown cause,

the housemaids had opened the shutters and windows of the generally

unused library. The middle window was also a door; the white-painted

wood went halfway up. Molly turned along the little flag-paved path

that led past the library windows to the gate in the white railings

at the front of the house, and went in at the opened door. She had

had leave given to choose out any books she wished to read, and to

take them home with her; and it was just the sort of half-dawdling

employment suited to her taste this afternoon. She mounted on the

ladder to get to a particular shelf high up in a dark corner of the

room; and finding there some volume that looked interesting, she sat

down on the step to read part of it. There she sat, in her bonnet and

cloak, when Osborne suddenly came in. He did not see her at first;

indeed, he seemed in such a hurry that he probably might not have

noticed her at all, if she had not spoken.

"Am I in your way? I only came here for a minute to look for some

books." She came down the steps as she spoke, still holding the book

in her hand.

"Not at all. It is I who am disturbing you. I must just write a

letter for the post, and then I shall be gone. Is not this open door

too cold for you?"