“Stupid kid or not, it sounds like it had a pretty serious effect on you.”
“Listen to you, getting all deep.” He grinned. He was a pretty good actor, she decided, but not that good. “Like I said, I was a dumbass. She was hot. I thought I was in love. I thought maybe she was too. She wasn’t. End of story.”
She sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. “What was her name?”
“Brooke.”
She wanted to ask more, but the brusqueness of his reply clearly stated he considered the subject closed without even divulging the girl’s last name.
“I was with my first boyfriend for a long time,” she said instead. “We grew up together, so it wasn’t really that I loved him in that way. He was just always there, you know?”
“Why are we tossing around the L-word so much?”
“Hey, you said it first.”
“Then I’ll be the first to shut it down.”
“Fine by me.” She searched her brain for another topic maybe he wouldn’t shut down. Speaking of obvious love… “How long have you and Brian known each other?”
“Freshman year. I knew of him before, but we officially met in art class. He was like the big class star, at least in there. I got sick of it, so I went over to his table one day to tell him I thought his still lifes were okay but his perspective sucked. He said, ‘Hey, f**k you.’ After class, we beat the shit out of each other in the hallway and landed in detention together. Started talking about music. And a dysfunctional friendship was born. We still argue to this day over who won the fight. There’s been more than one rematch.”
She snickered. “Sounds like you two.”
“We’re a good team, though. Especially at work.”
“How are you a team at a tattoo shop?”
“Well, see, he’s stellar at portraits. When Brian draws someone’s face, it looks more like them than they do. You’ve seen his work, right?”
“I saw the drawing he did of Candace. It’s incredible.”
“But he’s not all that great at lettering. It’s his dirty little secret, and I love to give him shit about it. I’m just the opposite. No way in hell I want to f**k up the face of someone’s loved one on their body, you know? Shit makes me twitchy to even think about. So I draw up all his lettering, and he never throws any portraits my way. Give me a scorpion or a gecko or something any day, I’ll bang it out in no time. But not Grandma Lucy.”
Macy smiled at the way enthusiasm seeped into his voice whenever he talked about his and Brian’s work. “That’s really neat. I wish Candace and I had a story that exciting, but I can’t even remember the first time we met. Our parents are friends. She was homeschooled, and I was pretty much the only person her mom would let her hang out with.” She quieted for a moment, frowning, thinking. “Like with my first boyfriend, probably the only reason she puts up with me is that I’ve always been there.”
“Oh, shut up. There you go again. Although I do hope for your sake that your parents aren’t anything like hers. I don’t know them, but I’ve heard Brian’s horror stories.”
“They’re not. Just your typical nosy, meddling, occasionally embarrassing parents.”
“Huh. I guess you’re lucky to have parents around to be nosy and embarrassing. Mine didn’t hang in there long enough.”
She cringed inwardly. Another touchy subject. “I’m sorry.”
He waved a hand. “It’s all right. It was a long time ago. I’m not gonna go to pieces talking about it or anything.”
“So your grandmother raised you after…”
“Yeah. She always said I was the only thing that pulled her through after the accident. My grandpa died when I was a baby, and my older brother was a dick from birth, so she was pretty much all alone except for me and my sister. Made me feel like there was a reason I walked away from the wreck with hardly a scratch, you know?”
“Of course there was a reason. Did you ever doubt it?”
“Through my teen-angst dumbassedness, I think I threw a few ‘fuck the world, I wish I’d died instead of my folks’ tantrums, but I got over that. Brian would always be there to kick my drunk ass if I needed it. Believe me, I f**king needed it.”
“Sounds like he’s been a really good friend to you.”
He was silent for a moment. When he spoke, revulsion twisted his voice. “Brian is the brother I should’ve had. Instead of that sorry-ass motherfucker I got strapped with.”
“What’s the deal with your brother?” She racked her brain but couldn’t recall him ever telling her why he hated the guy so much. He barely talked about him at all.
“He’s an ass**le. It needs no other explanation.”
“There’s got to be more to it than that. I’m pretty sure everyone has a relative they can say that about. But you…you take it to a whole new level.”
“Yeah? Well, he takes being an ass**le to a whole new level.”
“It’s just that I would think after the tragedy you guys went through, you would, I don’t know, pull together.”
“You’d think wrong.” The chill coming off him was palpable. She lifted her head and frowned at him.
“What did he do to you?”
“Let’s change the subject, all right? I don’t want to f**k the night up now.”
Stung, she settled her head back on his shoulder. “Okay.”
He was right. She didn’t want that either. She’d just gotten carried away putting together all his many scattered puzzle pieces. Something told her there wouldn’t be a complete picture for a long, long time, if ever.
God, in the past few minutes they’d covered death, pregnancy and heartbreak—and his brother was the deal breaker? Weird. If she kept asking questions, he was probably going to get dressed and bolt.
She definitely didn’t want that. Even more disturbing, she found herself wondering what it would be like to have this every night. The warm solidity of his shoulder under her cheek, his fingers lazily traveling up and down her arm.
It couldn’t work. He’d made the terms clear in the car, and she’d agreed. Now that she’d let him in, she had to be on her guard. Lately she’d often thought he was different than he’d seemed when she first met him—the wisecracking, don’t-give-a-damn-about-anyone-or-anything tattoo artist—but it was distinctly possible he wasn’t. At least when it came to her.
How would she compare to the mystery girl who obviously splattered his heart all over hell, or even to the one he’d kept around because she was “insane” and exciting?
Macy had wanted to explore her wild side a bit with him…that’s why she was here. She’d wanted to discover if she even had a wild side. She hadn’t expected to feel duller than ever afterward.
Chapter Ten
The last thing he’d planned on was falling asleep with her snuggled at his side, her head on his shoulder like they were…a couple or something. One moment, they’d been lying in her bed in the peaceful semidarkness; the next, a swath of sunlight was hitting him right between the eyes.
Might as well make the most of it. He rolled over and groped for her warm body only to touch the coolness of empty sheets. Lifting his head and focusing, he not only saw visual evidence she was missing, but an aroma was drifting in from the kitchen that awakened parts of him that were famished for more than her body. He always woke up starving.