They slip more than once, and tears blur my eyes. Todd can't die because I had a meltdown. I've kept him safe for four years. I'm not going to fail him now. With renewed effort, I manage to pierce the duct tape once with the blades and scratch my thumb. I shift and do it again and again, crying quietly at the pain caused when I miss stabbing the tape and hit my hands.
Pausing when The Monster crosses through the living area towards the bedrooms, I resume the moment he turns his back. With a hefty tug, I manage to break one side of the bonds and twist my hands free before bounding to my feet.
"Hey!" The Monster shouts, emerging from my room.
I reach for the gun in my pocket only to find it gone. My eyes search the floor frantically as I duck an attempt to grab me by The Monster. Skirting the armchair, I spot it and lunge.
The moment I lift it, he freezes. "Don't get no ideas, Claudia. You shoot me and the whole apartment goes up in flames."
"It'd be worth it for this to be over!" I respond and wipe the tears from my eyes with one hand.
"Not if you kill Todd in the process."
"You said he's in the trunk of your car!"
"Or under the kitchen sink. I had to move your snowman jar." His smile is cunning.
My heart sinks. There's no way for me to know what the truth is without verifying it for myself. I struggle to determine where Todd might really be. At four fifteen he said he was almost home. It's a quarter 'til five now. Assuming he made it in the door, he would've hung up his key beside the door the way he does every day.
I inch to position myself for a clear view of the area around the door.
The muzzle of the gun is trembling, thanks to my unsteady hand. I've dreamt of a world without The Monster and experienced it this past weekend.
But I never considered what it'd be like to have the choice and power to kill him like I do now.
"I sprayed the cabinets down good," The Monster adds.
"Let him out."
"No."
I choke back a sob. "Jake … just go! Leave us alone! No one will find you here … just run to Mexico or something!"
"I'll be hunted wherever I go, thanks to you." He shakes his head. "No, Claudia, if I'm going down, you're coming with me, and so is Todd." The Monster pulls a lighter from his pocket.
"You won't do it," I say. "You're a narcissist."