"Ah. You know where we're going next?" I ask him.
"Soldier's home?"
"You know, we'll go there next week, before Christmas, with a truck load of presents instead. We're going to the house to do something that will probably piss off your sister."
Todd brightens. "I won't tell."
I probably will. I don't like the idea of lying to her or deceiving her in any way. It's what's prevented me from pressing Todd for details about what happened. Now that I know, I can't not do something.
"One condition."
He's leaning forward eagerly, waiting.
"What I'm going to teach you is for defense only. You can never, ever use it to hurt anyone for any other reason, even The Monster. You got it?"
"I think so."
"I need another promise."
"Okay. I promise. Defense only."
"I'm going to teach you to shoot."
He gasps and then quickly tries to shutter his emotions, as if not wanting me to suspect he wants to learn badly enough to buy his own.
"I'll be like you?" he squeaks finally. "A real soldier?"
"With some practice." I smile. "You know what makes a damn good soldier?"
Todd shakes his head.
"A good person. You have to know when to use force and when to walk away. You have to think for yourself. You must be compassionate and gentle with the people around you but strong enough to stand up for what's right."
"I have to be a man."
I almost laugh, but he's so serious, I don't. "Yeah. You have to be a man."
"A damned good one."
"There ya go."
"Don't tell Claudia I cussed."
I do laugh this time. His sister will surely kill me when she ever finds out. I can't stand the idea of them being defenseless, and I know her well enough that I suspect she won't call if something happens.
Todd will. Giving him the responsibility of knowing for a fact how to kill a man is a gamble, but it's also something my father taught Mikael and me when we were seven. With the right instruction, and reminders about Lance, Henderson and others who will never recover from their battle wounds, I think Todd is malleable enough to listen and follow the rules.