As I stumbled into yesterday's clothes, the phone rang. I dismissed a fleeting thought it might be Paul North or Suzie calling again. It was neither. My niece Maureen hardly paused for my hello.
"I can't believe you didn't spend the night with him! What's wrong with you Aunt Sarah?" I smiled at her exuberance as I lay back down on my bed. "Tell me you at least . . ."
"No!" I screamed back at her. "We acted like civilized adults and had a nice evening."
"God, your generation is so uptight! He's a catch, Aunt Sarah! Don't tell me you can't see that! He's perfect for you. Everyone could see you were gaga over each other! God, I couldn't sleep fantasying over the sex-thoughts of you guys screwing each other's brains out!"
I managed to blurt out her mother and I had a long and fruitful conversation. The announcement stopped her cold.
"That's great!" she said. "The talking to I gave her must have helped."
"I understand you called her a stubborn bitch. That wasn't very nice."
"It's what I called you, Aunt Sarah and I met you for the first time yesterday."
"No, you didn't. I held you at your christening and changed your diapers."
"Now you can change my new baby's nappies when you come up to visit. But wait until you hear the name I'll call you if you don't nail down Paul North and haul him in!"
I tried to change the subject by telling her I'd return her friend's dress but she ignored me. "Here's the poop," she said, proceeding to spiel out background on my wedding reception companion. "He's a widower. His wife died a year or two ago; she was sick for ages, bed ridden. He has two children, a boy and a girl, ages unknown, but young. He's worth a gazillion bucks, he's handsome, and really likes you! What are you waiting for? God, Aunt Sarah, an opportunity like this doesn't come along in a million years!" She added, "You're not getting any younger, you know."
I felt a pang of guilt learning a detailed history of Paul North from my niece who'd done some quick ask-around research, but I didn't stop her.
"You should see the wedding present he gave Mike and Martha! It's a crystal set of glasses that I bet cost a thousand bucks! He never met them before, only Mike's father. God, if you had put out for him last night you'd probably have a new convertible parked in front of the hotel!"
I laughed in spite of myself. I already loved this rediscovered family. "Are you suggesting I should have offered my body? . . ."