"That's not healthy what if I had some kind of disease and was dying not that I do," I laugh. I actually laugh! The sound of my laughter sounds so foreign to my own ears I don't even recognizes it. I can't believe he made me laugh.
The waiter drops his head and by the way his shoulders are moving I think he is laughing at me. "I can't believe I laugh," I snatch the bottle back from him "it's been two months since the last time I laugh". I take a drink not caring that his lips were just on them. I had it first and this calls for a celebration. "The last person who made me laugh was Gabe, he was the love of my life," now that I think about it I was always laughing around him. He always found a way to make me smile or laugh just thinking about him makes me smile. "But then he died," my smiles drops "and to top it off he died in my arms" my voice cracks at the end. Saying that out loud makes my heart sting all over again. I take a big gulp trying to wash the pain away. The waiter tries to reach for my hand to comfort me but I quickly pull away "Wow there cowboy I'm not a fan on touching it has nothing to do with you trust me it's something personal. I don't even let my own family touch me". What the hell is wrong with me? I haven't talked this much to my own family and here I am opening up to a complete stranger. He slowly pulls his hand back as he watches me. I can't read his expression because of the mask I don't know if that is a good thing right now. "Yeah I'm all shades of fucked up" I mumble. I wounder if I'll ever let my guard down again? The better question is do I even want to?
The sounds of fireworks scares me right out of my thoughts. The sky lights up with all different colors looking even more beautiful than before. The water changes color every time a different firework explodes. I feel like a little girl again watching the fireworks on the fourth if July. Even tho I was never allowed to watch the towns firework my father always made sure to give me and Sammy our own private show in the backyard. I feel the waiter's eyes on me as I watch the fireworks. I turn to face the waiter and I can't stop the gasp that escapes my mouth. The reflection of the fireworks makes his face look ravishing. I can't really tell what color his eyes are because they keep changing due to the fireworks. I take in a deep breath and his scent hits me like a brick in the face. "Happy New Years" I whisper trying to break the awkwardness that has surrounded us. His eyes searches my face as he leans in. My brain is yelling at me to pull back but my body does the complete opposite. His large hand cups the back of my neck as he gently brushes his lips against mines. I feel a shiver run threw my body which is weird because there is no wind. My mind is telling me this is wrong. I don't even know who he is. I can actually hear my heart pounding again inside of my chest and here I thought it didn't work anymore. His kiss is so soft and gentle it's like he is afraid to break me. I part my mouth to tell him to stop but he takes advantage to shove his tongue inside my mouth. Once our tongues touch I feel like I've been shocked, a small moan escapes my throat out of pure pleasure. Oh god how can something so wrong feel so great?