Those words hit me so hard that they knock me down on my ass I feel all air leave my lungs."Gabe is dead?" I ask. That can't be true he can't be dead. No one answers my question it seems like they don't even notice that I'm standing here. This can't be true. "Where is he?" I ask more aggressively this time. I'm fighting back my own tears I don't want to cry because this isn't true Gabe isn't dead. He can't be."Why the fuck is no one answering me?" I yell from the top of my lungs as I look around the room daring some one to look at me but no one answers they don't even look my way. "What the fuck?" I whisper to myself. If no one is going to tell me where he is than I'll just have to go look for him myself.
I stand up and look around the room hoping to find my answer. That's when I see a white coffin surrounded by white roses and candles. Where did this come from? It wasn't here when I walked in or was it? Oh god! That can't be him. My stomach drops to the floor I think I'm going to be sick. My heart is pounding so hard that I'm sure everyone can hear it. I need to go see for myself who is in there. I have to fight my own legs for control every step I take they want to give up on me. My eyes are full with tears but I refuse to let them fall because that's not Gabe in there. After what seems like a life time I finally make it to the coffin. All I need to do is look down to see who is in there but my body is paralyze I have no control over it. Come on Jane you can do this just look down. I can do this on the count of 3. I take in a deep breath as I count in my head. When I get to the number 3 I dip my head to look inside.
Oh god! My legs finally give up dropping me on my knees. It's Gabe! "Oh god Gabe" I say as tears finally start rolling down my face. It seems like he is sleeping but I know better. He is wearing a white tux and his hair is comb back. He looks so handsome like always. I caress his face with my shaky hand. He is so cold like ice. "I'm so sorry" I say as sobs rip up my throat. I lay my head on top of his coffin like I used to lay it on his chest. Only this time there is no heartbeat to welcome me. Just the thought that I will never hear his heartbeat again breaks something inside of me. Every one is right I did this. I killed him. All I want to do is stay here with him until I join him.