Jane Eyre - Page 316/412

"Your real name you will not give?"

"No: I fear discovery above all things; and whatever disclosure

would lead to it, I avoid."

"You are quite right, I am sure," said Diana. "Now do, brother, let

her be at peace a while."

But when St. John had mused a few moments he recommenced as

imperturbably and with as much acumen as ever.

"You would not like to be long dependent on our hospitality--you

would wish, I see, to dispense as soon as may be with my sisters'

compassion, and, above all, with my CHARITY (I am quite sensible of

the distinction drawn, nor do I resent it--it is just): you desire

to be independent of us?"

"I do: I have already said so. Show me how to work, or how to seek

work: that is all I now ask; then let me go, if it be but to the

meanest cottage; but till then, allow me to stay here: I dread

another essay of the horrors of homeless destitution."

"Indeed you SHALL stay here," said Diana, putting her white hand on

my head. "You SHALL," repeated Mary, in the tone of undemonstrative

sincerity which seemed natural to her.

"My sisters, you see, have a pleasure in keeping you," said Mr. St.

John, "as they would have a pleasure in keeping and cherishing a

half-frozen bird, some wintry wind might have driven through their

casement. I feel more inclination to put you in the way of keeping

yourself, and shall endeavour to do so; but observe, my sphere is

narrow. I am but the incumbent of a poor country parish: my aid

must be of the humblest sort. And if you are inclined to despise

the day of small things, seek some more efficient succour than such

as I can offer."

"She has already said that she is willing to do anything honest she

can do," answered Diana for me; "and you know, St. John, she has no

choice of helpers: she is forced to put up with such crusty people

as you."

"I will be a dressmaker; I will be a plain-workwoman; I will be a

servant, a nurse-girl, if I can be no better," I answered.

"Right," said Mr. St. John, quite coolly. "If such is your spirit,

I promise to aid you, in my own time and way."

He now resumed the book with which he had been occupied before tea.

I soon withdrew, for I had talked as much, and sat up as long, as my

present strength would permit.