Jane Eyre - Page 318/412

If in our trio there was a superior and a leader, it was Diana.

Physically, she far excelled me: she was handsome; she was

vigorous. In her animal spirits there was an affluence of life and

certainty of flow, such as excited my wonder, while it baffled my

comprehension. I could talk a while when the evening commenced, but

the first gush of vivacity and fluency gone, I was fain to sit on a

stool at Diana's feet, to rest my head on her knee, and listen

alternately to her and Mary, while they sounded thoroughly the topic

on which I had but touched. Diana offered to teach me German. I

liked to learn of her: I saw the part of instructress pleased and

suited her; that of scholar pleased and suited me no less. Our

natures dovetailed: mutual affection--of the strongest kind--was

the result. They discovered I could draw: their pencils and

colour-boxes were immediately at my service. My skill, greater in

this one point than theirs, surprised and charmed them. Mary would

sit and watch me by the hour together: then she would take lessons;

and a docile, intelligent, assiduous pupil she made. Thus occupied,

and mutually entertained, days passed like hours, and weeks like

days.

As to Mr. St John, the intimacy which had arisen so naturally and

rapidly between me and his sisters did not extend to him. One

reason of the distance yet observed between us was, that he was

comparatively seldom at home: a large proportion of his time

appeared devoted to visiting the sick and poor among the scattered

population of his parish.

No weather seemed to hinder him in these pastoral excursions: rain

or fair, he would, when his hours of morning study were over, take

his hat, and, followed by his father's old pointer, Carlo, go out on

his mission of love or duty--I scarcely know in which light he

regarded it. Sometimes, when the day was very unfavourable, his

sisters would expostulate. He would then say, with a peculiar

smile, more solemn than cheerful "And if I let a gust of wind or a sprinkling of rain turn me aside

from these easy tasks, what preparation would such sloth be for the

future I propose to myself?"

Diana and Mary's general answer to this question was a sigh, and

some minutes of apparently mournful meditation.

But besides his frequent absences, there was another barrier to

friendship with him: he seemed of a reserved, an abstracted, and

even of a brooding nature. Zealous in his ministerial labours,

blameless in his life and habits, he yet did not appear to enjoy

that mental serenity, that inward content, which should bet he

reward of every sincere Christian and practical philanthropist.

Often, of an evening, when he sat at the window, his desk and papers

before him, he would cease reading or writing, rest his chin on his

hand, and deliver himself up to I know not what course of thought;

but that it was perturbed and exciting might be seen in the frequent

flash and changeful dilation of his eye.