Jane Eyre - Page 406/412

"And to bear with my infirmities, Jane: to overlook my

deficiencies."

"Which are none, sir, to me. I love you better now, when I can

really be useful to you, than I did in your state of proud

independence, when you disdained every part but that of the giver

and protector."

"Hitherto I have hated to be helped--to be led: henceforth, I feel

I shall hate it no more. I did not like to put my hand into a

hireling's, but it is pleasant to feel it circled by Jane's little

fingers. I preferred utter loneliness to the constant attendance of

servants; but Jane's soft ministry will be a perpetual joy. Jane

suits me: do I suit her?"

"To the finest fibre of my nature, sir."

"The case being so, we have nothing in the world to wait for: we

must be married instantly."

He looked and spoke with eagerness: his old impetuosity was rising.

"We must become one flesh without any delay, Jane: there is but the

licence to get--then we marry."

"Mr. Rochester, I have just discovered the sun is far declined from

its meridian, and Pilot is actually gone home to his dinner. Let me

look at your watch."

"Fasten it into your girdle, Janet, and keep it henceforward: I

have no use for it."

"It is nearly four o'clock in the afternoon, sir. Don't you feel

hungry?"

"The third day from this must be our wedding-day, Jane. Never mind

fine clothes and jewels, now: all that is not worth a fillip."

"The sun has dried up all the rain-drops, sir. The breeze is still:

it is quite hot."

"Do you know, Jane, I have your little pearl necklace at this moment

fastened round my bronze scrag under my cravat? I have worn it

since the day I lost my only treasure, as a memento of her."

"We will go home through the wood: that will be the shadiest way."

He pursued his own thoughts without heeding me.

"Jane! you think me, I daresay, an irreligious dog: but my heart

swells with gratitude to the beneficent God of this earth just now.

He sees not as man sees, but far clearer: judges not as man judges,

but far more wisely. I did wrong: I would have sullied my innocent

flower--breathed guilt on its purity: the Omnipotent snatched it

from me. I, in my stiff-necked rebellion, almost cursed the

dispensation: instead of bending to the decree, I defied it.

Divine justice pursued its course; disasters came thick on me: I

was forced to pass through the valley of the shadow of death. HIS

chastisements are mighty; and one smote me which has humbled me for

ever. You know I was proud of my strength: but what is it now,

when I must give it over to foreign guidance, as a child does its

weakness? Of late, Jane--only--only of late--I began to see and

acknowledge the hand of God in my doom. I began to experience

remorse, repentance; the wish for reconcilement to my Maker. I

began sometimes to pray: very brief prayers they were, but very

sincere.